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Song Parodies -> "You're Floppy"

Original Song Title:

"Your Body"

Original Performer:

Christina Aguilera

Parody Song Title:

"You're Floppy"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Part of my Pop Danthology 2012 self-challenge. No, this isn't an innuendo. I'm not nearly clever enough for that. This is about a dude who has the loosest joints imaginable. No dicks!
Ah, ah-ah
Ah, ah-ah

You're an awkward si-ight cause not one damn joint is ti-ight
From neck to shoulder to thi-igh, uh oh-oh, yeah (ah, ah-ah)
Each step is a flo-op like you're re-enactin' QWO-OP
And yet it seems you won't sto-op, uh oh-oh, yeah, hey, boy (ah, ah-ah)
If you were ju-ust double-joi-ointed
There would be mo-ore laugh-and-poi-ointin'
But you ain't so-olid, hey, boy (ah, ah-ah)
There's so many-y stretch-marks you-ou've gained
From your flippy-y-floppity-y ways
Least of your pro-oblems (ah, ah-ah)

I'll just say it outright, bud, you're floppy
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (ah, ah-ah)
It can't be that mu-uch fun, I'm really sorry
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Can't ignore it at all, bud, you're floppy
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (ah, ah-ah)
Pull tricks contortio-ioni-ists would love to copy
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (ah, ah-ah)

I've vaguely distu-urbed by how you twist, how's your ne-erves?
Cause all of that has to hu-urt, uh oh-oh, yeah, ha
How you got like this, don't kno-ow, known you for two days at mo-ost
There goes my Octodad jo-oke, uh oh-oh, yeah-hea-eah-eah, hey, boy (ah, ah-ah)
Is this a rea-eally sore to-opic?
Or do you lau-augh off those co-omments
'Bout how you wo-o-obbl-l-le? Hey, bo-oy (ah, ah-ah)
Impressed you li-ive by yourse-elf, mate
Even though your flail-tasti-ic gait
Just makes me go-o-oggl-le, say, say, hey (ah, ah-ah)

There's no way around it, bud, you're floppy
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (ah, ah-ah)
Must be awkward a-as all get out, I'm sorry
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
I'm still standin' here in shock, you're floppy
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (you're flo-oppy, hey, woo) (ah, ah-ah)
How do you keep you-our gri-ip while makin' coffee?
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (yeah, eh-ey, yeah-ah-eah) (ah, ah-ah)

Ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Ev'ry time you crawl around, I-I gape
Ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh
I pinch myself, make sure I'm a-awa-a-ake
He-e-e-e-ey-yeah-ee-yeah-ey
Ha, alright, say
Ah-ha-ha
It's like a demon took huma-an shape

It's kind of amazin', bud, you're floppy (he-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-ey-ee-yeah-eah, he-e-ey)
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (he-e-ey, he-e-ey, sa-ay)
But you won't quit you-our jo-ob, record ain't spo-o-otty
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (woo-oo)
Want to know you more (ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
Cause, bud, you're floppy (ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (say, say, he-e-e-ey, yeah-eah-eah)
Just to see how you-ou mo-ove (ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
When you get naughty (ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh)
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh (ah, ah-ah)

That's not to say I won't end on an innuendo, though. Or write a whole parody about robot sex. Like you do.

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