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Song Parodies -> "Tort People ( The Lawyer's Song)"

Original Song Title:

"Short People"

Original Performer:

Randy Newman

Parody Song Title:

"Tort People ( The Lawyer's Song)"

Parody Written by:

Malcolm Higgins

The Lyrics

tort people got no reason
tort people got no reason
tort people need no reasons
to sue

they got greedy hands
and beady eyes
in a lawyer's gown
tellin greatb big lies
they got hooky noses
and yellow teeth
they wear rubber soles
on their slimy little feet

well I don't want no tort people
don't want no tort people
don't want no tort people
around here

tort people are not the same as you and I
(fools, yes they lie)
they would sue their mothers
until the day they die
(what a wonderful world)

tort people got no reason
tort people got no reason
tort people need no reasons
to sue

they got little shady minds
and they stoop so low
handball on the curb,
they don't say hello
they got little hearts
that don't beat beat beat
they got little voices
that will bleat bleat bleat
they got grubby fingers
and legalistic minds
they gonna sue for every last dime

well I don't want no tort people
don't want no tort people
don't want no tort people
around here



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User Comments

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Royce Miller - April 20, 2004 - Report this comment
good parody, Malcolm
Laurence Dunne - April 20, 2004 - Report this comment
Laurence Dunne (hereafter referred to as 'party to the first part')hereby bequeath a comment to you Malcolm (hereafter referred to as 'party to the second part') regarding the nature of the parody (hereafter referred to as 'party to the third part'). The party to the third part is thouight of by the party to the first part as witty, sarcastic, sattirical, humorous, and generally a good-natured ribbing, and the party to the second part is therefore of elevated esteem in the mind of the party to the first part. However, this shall in no way oblige the party to the first part in any way, to perform any acts, including but not limited to making witty comments, voting for Malcolms parodies, writing messageboard messages about them, encouraging others to read them , etc). Discretionary future comments may be made and votes (good or bad) may be cast, entirely at the discretion of the party to the first part, without hindrance by party to the second part or prior expectations as to the nature of the comments or the scoring of the vote. Party to the second part agrees to foresake all rights to ideas, expressions, patentable comments, etc contained in party to the first parts activities with regard to party to the third part. The subsequent comment is the sole property of party to the first part and cannot be claimed, copied, distributed, stored or otherwise reproduced by any other party, except with the written consent of party to the first part. This contains the whole and entire agreement between party to the first part and party to the second part regarding comments about party to the third part, and replaces wholly any previous agreement between these two parties. If any clause of this agreement shall be found uninforcable in a court of law, the rest of this agreement shall continue to be in force. This agreement will continue in effect until both party to the first part and party to the second part agree in writing to provide thirty days notice to terminate. The actual comment covered by this agreement follows: "This parody rocks, 555 man"
Peregrin - April 20, 2004 - Report this comment
That's exactly what I was gonna say, Laurence!

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