Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "Guano: Mierda"

Original Song Title:

"Guantanamera"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Pete Seeger

Parody Song Title:

"Guano: Mierda"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Original music by Jose Fernandez Diaz; Music adaptation by Pete Seeger & Julian Orbon; Lyric adaptation by Julian Orbon, based on a poem by Jose Marti.Altamira (Spanish for 'high view') is a cave in Spain famous for its Upper Paleolithic cave paintings featuring drawings and polychrome rock paintings of wild mammals and human hands. The cave is 270 meters long and consists of a series of twisting passages and chambers. It was formed through collapses following early karstic phenomena in the calcerous rock of Mount Vispieres. (Karst topography is shaped by the dissolution of a soluble layer or layers of bedrock, usually carbonate rock such as limestone or dolomite.)
Yo soy un hombre sin cera;
No tengo una candela.
Luego, quiero una cerveza
Antes de ir en la cueva.

ESTRIBILLO:
Guano: mierda,
Murciélago-mierda.
Guano: mierda,
Murciélago-mierda.

No me gusta sobre la cabeza
Un tipo de excrecencia. . .
Está exudado quando vacía
Cada vampiro, como la vaca.

ESTRIBILLO:
Guano: mierda,
Murciélago-mierda.
Guano: mierda,
Murales no en la cueva.

No es el oler de rosa
Que ataca ahora mi sentido
Olfato; habría mentido,
Decir que fue otra cosa.

ESTRIBILLO:
Guano: mierda,
Murciélago-mierda.
Guano: mierda,
Murria llena la cueva.

Una pila, cima de liga, blanca,
Serrado; he encontrado.
Mi nariz está encerrado
En un panuélo que tranca.

ESTRIBILLO:
Guano: mierda,
Murciélago-mierda.
Guano: mierda,
Murmollos llenan oreja.

¡Un' roca dura en la tierra!
Pues, sobre mi, puedo escuchar
Fuente del sierra mierda.
Fuerte me llevo por el mar.

ESTRIBILLO:
Guano: mierda,
Perezco en la cueva.
Pedro me llama--
Muerte de la mierda.

-------------------------------------------------

I am a man who's lacking wax,
Meaning that I have no candle.
So I think I'll need a beer to relax
Before I pass that cave's mantel.

CHORUS:
Guano's excreta,
Gag-a-maggot bat excreta,
Guano's excreta,
Guard nose, aroma's not sweet--arrgh!

I do not want landing upon my pate
A certain type of excrescence,
The exudate of what rabid bats once ate,
Cascading like cows' cud-culled excretions.

CHORUS:
Guano's excreta,
Gag-a-maggot bat excreta,
Guano's excreta,
And this cave ain't Altamira.

It's not the aroma of rose
That is now massaging my sense of smell.
Olfactory message sent to nose
Is sulphurous and suggests hell.

CHORUS:
Guano's excreta,
Gag-a-maggot bat excreta,
Guano's excreta,
And with gloom this cave's repleter.

The calcified pile rises, a massif white
And serrated; source located.
I gag, nose closed, incarcerated
In white rag. . .bat-shite stalagmite!

CHORUS:
Guano's excreta,
Gag-a-maggot bat excreta,
Guano's excreta,
I hear murmurs of wing-beaters.

Rock-hard, it rises, Sierra Marde.
Then above me: evacuation
Washing in waves; me err: en garde? Nay!
Washed away--waste inundation.

CHORUS:
Gobs of excreta,
Gasp and gag on bat excreta.
Gone to Saint Peter--
Expiration from excreta.

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   6
 6
 6
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Catch 23 - November 08, 2006 - Report this comment
Fantastico!!!!! Cinco e cinco e cinco, senyore.
alvin rhodes - November 08, 2006 - Report this comment
a most articulate work on the subject
John Barry - November 08, 2006 - Report this comment
Gracias, amigos.
Meriadoc - November 08, 2006 - Report this comment
A splended bi-lingual effort!
Chuck A. Spear - November 08, 2006 - Report this comment
Mucho funnio!! The title alone is magnificent, and will stick with me for years!!
Susanna Viljanen - November 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Esa canción no estaba mierda. Cincos.
Miguel de Pacholec - November 09, 2006 - Report this comment
Bruce Wayne won't like it, but I'm glad you stepped up to bat. (Sorry, a Spanish translation of that pun wouldn't have worked.)

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/peteseeger1.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 1389