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Song Parodies -> "Cracker’s Pox’d Phallus"

Original Song Title:

"Crackerbox Palace"

Original Performer:

George Harrison

Parody Song Title:

"Cracker’s Pox’d Phallus"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

She was so young, his mom who bore
him—knocked up by daddy,
who too with pigs and cows did spawn—
therefore, lots of VD. But dread?!

She’s subjected to cracker’s pox’d phallus
every time that they screwed.
Was born a boy from cracker’s pox’d phallus
At 13, with mom he started getting lewd.

Not only shtupped his mom but two
sisters who got their start
when mom’s first cousin came to woo
her an then plied his part. And then they bred.

Like dad he had a cracker’s pox’d phallus. . .
did what redneck men do—
put in chick kin their cracker’s pox’d phallus,
which then will release those little worms that screw.

The gals welcome a cracker’s pox’d phallus—
they’ll be expecting soon
and then they’ll disgorge cracker-box ballast—
two days later, readying for dad the poon.

They ply their wood, the little lads;
in kin they create life.
They all seem part of incest’s thrall. . .
mom’s a de facto wife. With sons bred.

Welcoming each son’s cracker-pox’d phallus—
she’ll be expecting soon.
Then sip and drip from a leaden chalice
white lightning that’s made by the light of the moon.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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AFW - November 30, 2012 - Report this comment
Far out..(or should I say in) and creative
Leough - November 30, 2012 - Report this comment
555! That boy's name wasn't Banjo Harry by any chance?
RickC - November 30, 2012 - Report this comment
I had forgotten this song, thanks for the reminder, JB. "They ply their wood" cracked me up! 555
Meriadoc - December 04, 2012 - Report this comment
Another excellent anthropological piece from Cracker Jack.

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