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Song Parodies -> "I've Deleted files"

Original Song Title:

"I Can See For Miles"

Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"I've Deleted files"

Parody Written by:

Rick Duncan

The Lyrics

Chucky's not the only one with computer issues.........
I've seen advertising, now that's no surprise
I'm sick of the blurbs saying I can get more size

I've deleted files and files and files and files and files
And cookies...

Now I think that I don't know computers like I thought I did
I don't want to have to go next door and ask the neighbors' kid

Well, there's a pop-up here
That changed my home page, dear
I'm clicking like a fool
I'm losing my cool

I've deleted trash by piles
I've deleted sexy smiles
I've deleted files and files and files and files and files
And hist'ry

They take advantage of the fact that I just ain't a computer geek
I see so many offers and big lies it fills my hard drive every week

All they offer me
It says it's all free
Who do they think I am?
To fall for this scam

I've deleted spam by piles
I've deleted trips to isles
I've deleted files and files and files and files and files
Where's Norton?

I know I'll receive them, it's part of the net
But I never knew how much garbage I would get

I've deleted files and files and files and files and files
Hate Windows...

The golden shower and the donkey show are mine to see any night
I thought that I would need a credit card to see those porno sites

Well, here's a joke on me
They've stolen my I.D.
I'm gonna lose my mind
Robbing me blind

I'm deleting files and files
All this crap goes on for miles
I'm deleting files and files and files and files and files
And files and files and files and files

I'm deleting files and files
I'm repeating files and files
I'm brow-beating files and files
Self-defeating files and files

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 25

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   25

User Comments

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Know 1 can hear you dream - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Counting your parodies it´s apparent that you´ve also been "creating files and files and files..."
Johnny D - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Reminds me of The Moody Blues' "In The Beginning":

[first man]
I think
I think I am
Therefore I am..... I think.....

Of course you are, my bright little star,
I've miles
And miles
Of files
Pretty files of your forefathers' fruit
And now to suit
Our great computer
You're magnetic ink.

[first man]
I'm more than that
I know I am
At least, I think I must be....

[inner man]
There you go, man
Keep as cool as you can
Face piles
Of trials
With smiles.
It riles them to believe that you perceive the web they weave
And keep on thinking free.

Paul Robinson - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
OH, YEAH! Great job, Rick. You really struck a chord with me here. I've been gnashing what's left of my teeth, banging the table with my fist, cursing, I guess, and casting out evil oaths for the last couple weeks as every day my PC became slower, and slower........and slower................a-n-d sl-ow---werrr....until finally it could not move. I ran some "Task Manager" functions and they showed "100% CPU usage" with absolutely no programs open...not a promising statistic in my book. I finally figured out it had something to do with my Damned VirusScan Settings, which, by the way, I am CERTAIN I never went to and changed. I must have somehow hit a combination that somehow did that. Anyway, once I changed that setting back to what it should be and did some disk clean-up & de-fragging it seems to be running pretty much OK...I hope. I'm really very annoyed at all the software vendors. Yes, it appears there really are awful Virus's we need protection from, but these SOB's are really milking it for all it's worth with a constant barrage of warnings, "special offers", and a rather suspicious parade of messages telling me that once again they have saved me and the day from some sort of Virus - I'm beginning to wonder if those infections might be COMING from my the makers of my VirusScan program or if they might even be making some of it up out of thin air. You say, "Surely these upstanding business entity's wouldn't be involved in such a scheme.", and I say to you, "Dammit, for once and for all stop calling me 'Shirley'..."(bad-a-bing). It sure seems like an easy way to boost sales, especially all their upgrade hot-wax...
Rick D - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
JD, I'm not familiar with the MB quote. I assume it's literal. Does fit, though. And Paul, yes, something similar happened to me also. I had to return my pc to factory zero and reload everything all over again. Do you have any idea how many sound files i have
John Barry - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Computerization and its discontents. Trenchant commentary on digital dreck.
Paul Robinson - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Rick - Not exactly, but my rough estimate would be "a whole f*cking sh*tload", would that be about right? Trying to recreate all your sound files could not have been a whole lot of fun. I was crapping at the idea of trying to reconstruct my modest collection. I remember how ticked off I was when I first started downloading my CD collection to my hard drive and none of the CD's I loaded one evening (about 20) created any music...I had file folders with the song titles on them, but they were empty...Turned out I needed to have ALL possible volume controls placed on "Mute" to do it the way I wanted to and I missed one (I think there are about 4 or 5 such controls and they are not all in the same program areas, pretty ridiculous if you ask me, which they didn't. But that was not really that big a deal. maybe 2 hours of time and I could do other things in between each CD album download of about 5 minutes....
Rick D - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Paul... I was only talking about MY recordings. I figured out once that if you listened one hour a day to just recordings I've had something to do with, you'd be wasting away for almost three months. ( No one could actually do it, they'd have to strangle me long before the end)
Guy - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
Yeah - this stuff is really beginning to get out of hand. Congress needs to pass some legislation against these guys who try to write all over your hard drives and edit your system registry at will with their canned HTML routines and then have the balls to really enforce it. I have my stuff so locked down that I have to unlock things at times just to do something legitimate on the internet.

Well done Rick - I really liked this parody.
alvin rhodes - July 31, 2004 - Report this comment
funny as hell...nice job
Meriadoc - August 01, 2004 - Report this comment
I love parodies about spam! :-)
Adagio - August 01, 2004 - Report this comment
Very timely, Rick! (SOTM) 5's
Know 1 can hear you dream - August 03, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Already commented. Now restoring my 5s. I thought. Then I realised that this was submitted after the abduction. Me so stupid. :-)
Arwen - August 05, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Rick...I don't know this one...but I'll try to find it and take a listen before the end of the month...=)
Ahnonamis - August 08, 2004 - Report this comment
DKTOS, I'll download it and come back to vote though. Assuming the pacing is on, I'd give it 3 5's.
BLO-TOWN - August 08, 2004 - Report this comment
SOTM-I voted...
Phil Alexander - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
Thought I'd already commented on this... most enjoyable: both the parody and the thought of someone else doing this ;-)
Leo Jay - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
SOTM - great stuff Rick.
Johnny D - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM July) Still De-leteful!
Agrimorfee - August 09, 2004 - Report this comment
555, especially for changing each chorus.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - August 10, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This one made me file...pile...mile...isle...SMILE! (nice rhyming by the way). Enjoyable but could have been funnier. 5-4-5
Phil Nelson - August 10, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) Don't know the original, but hilarious stuff. 5's
Dee Range - August 10, 2004 - Report this comment
5-5-5 SOTM Great work, and true
Melhi - August 14, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) This one gave me smiles and smiles... - August 23, 2004 - Report this comment
Been there - you're describing my recent experience pretty much picture-perfectly. I actually can't believe I'm typing this on the same PC that I nearly had to kill and start over. Anyhoo - fun stuff. I can give you fives and fives and fives and fives and fives. Oh yeeaah.
Meriadoc - August 25, 2004 - Report this comment
(SOTM) All those files still made me smile... :-)
Claude Prez - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Voted on this earlier but never commented; great stuff.
Peregrin - August 30, 2004 - Report this comment
Good one Rick, we can all relate!
Jeff Reuben - August 30, 2004 - Report this comment
sotm--good job, I remember reading this when it first came out, but didn't comment for some reason, sorry about that.

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