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Song Parodies -> "Bark, Then Tear-Maul Canine Sinks"

Original Song Title:

"Hark the Herald Angels Sing"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Bark, Then Tear-Maul Canine Sinks"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

Bark, then tear-maul canine si-inks
Gory teeth and your blood drinks
Piece of derm, the cur defi-iles
Dog'll skin ya, wreck your smile

Joyfully he rends your thi-ighs
Joyless are his cold dead eyes
Since a whelp he has been trained
Dog, to gore—there's death, mayhem

Bark, then tear-maul canine sinks
Scoring you, then your blood drinks

Bites you till your limbs are to-orn
Bites you till your skin is shorn.
Say “goodbye” to your left thu-umb
Offspring of a curish womb
Maimed your flesh; “Oh, bad doggie!”
Owners bark cursorily
With crazed meth freaks the mutt dwells
Dog and men, all fiends from hell

Bark, then tear-maul canine brings
Gore outpour from sanguine springs

Jail the meth freaks won’t rece-eive
Dogs laws are a fright’ning mess
Galled maul apologists si-ing
“In this land, doggies are king!
Fie on your losing an ey-e!”
Nor do they care if folks di-ie
Nor that sons pass just past birth
Nor that these mutts curse the earth
Barking apologists sink
In their teeth rather than think

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Patrick - July 14, 2013 - Report this comment
I've had a few encounters with dangerous dogs, and the owners tend to be even more frightening. You've got that story down perfectly.

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