Song Parodies -> The Ballad of Christmas Losers V
| Original Song Title: | "Winter Wonderland" |
| Original Performer: | Traditional |
| Parody Song Title: | "The Ballad of Christmas Losers V" |
| Parody Written by: | Andrew D. Lacroix |
This will be the last Christmas parody I'll do for the year. I have gotten sick of Christmas songs. I will resume normal parodies ASAP.
We all wish we could leave
Early on Christmas Eve
As we rot in hell
The sales sure swell
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Aisle three has the candy
With a stressed-out stocker, Sandy
Has not had a date
Since late '88
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
In the lot there's a cart leader
Who wishes he could just up and quit
He'll say "Screw you, I'm working neither
Take back your job, it's worthless s**t!"
Later on, we'll think it's heaven
When we all get out at seven
Cashiers have gone wrong
Lines three miles long
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
The snow is getting high outside
We might be stuck for the night
We just ought to leave
Early this eve
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
We will just go anyway
Nobody will shop here today
With three feet of snow
There's nowhere to go
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
In the office there's the store manager
With a gun barrel to his head
One shot, we all know the result
Big bang boom, he is dead
Later on, if we get tired
We can set the store on fire
Can they take the heat?
Days off will be sweet
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Early on Christmas Eve
As we rot in hell
The sales sure swell
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Aisle three has the candy
With a stressed-out stocker, Sandy
Has not had a date
Since late '88
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
In the lot there's a cart leader
Who wishes he could just up and quit
He'll say "Screw you, I'm working neither
Take back your job, it's worthless s**t!"
Later on, we'll think it's heaven
When we all get out at seven
Cashiers have gone wrong
Lines three miles long
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
The snow is getting high outside
We might be stuck for the night
We just ought to leave
Early this eve
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
We will just go anyway
Nobody will shop here today
With three feet of snow
There's nowhere to go
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
In the office there's the store manager
With a gun barrel to his head
One shot, we all know the result
Big bang boom, he is dead
Later on, if we get tired
We can set the store on fire
Can they take the heat?
Days off will be sweet
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Working in a Wal-Mart Wonderland
Written 12/11/07 by Andrew D. Lacroix.
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You sound like you've been Wal-Martyred. Here's some fodder for your parody stocking along with some sawbucks to tie you over as the store burns to the ground.
Not bad at all.
Wal'ing where the Grinch purveys cheap crap.
Guy, PL, John, thank you all for commenting. I wrote this as a tribute to the place where evryone does their shopping. Once again, Agri didn't comment on a Wally World parody because he thinks I referred to his wife as a "s**thead". Again, Agri, I wasn't talking about your wife. Have a great holiday!
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