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Song Parodies -> "Roll up your Sleeve(There's ½ a Gram in this Spoon"

Original Song Title:

"Man on the Moon"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

REM

Parody Song Title:

"Roll up your Sleeve(There's ½ a Gram in this Spoon"

Parody Written by:

Paul Robinson

The Lyrics

Guess you could call this an "anti-drug" piece...

(Instrumental intro)

Bought a spoonful of cocaine last night
Oh, yeah, oh, man
Man, I copped me some really righteous grass
kick your ass, man
Morphine & Percosettes - will ease your distress
no pain's the plan
Missed a vein last night and it sure made a mess
wasted a gram
Pimp your Sister, slice your wrist
When things get bad
Will not make heaven and you won't be missed
Devil's your man

I hear you say, "Dude, could you share some?
Cut me off a quarter-an-ounce"
Hey man, now you're making me nervous; I'm shaking
guess I shot too much
Roll up your sleeve, there's half-a-gram in the spoon
all just for you
Tie me off, please, I'm needing relief
my hands are just not too cool

Nose is so blocked off, it is stuffed up good.
I just can't snort
Pukin' in the sink, man, this junk is good.
That's my report
Ripped-off a cooker who was baking up meth
Scrambled-up head
Dude smelled like ketone and he had bad breath
He looked half-dead

Nose candy; it will destroy your sinus
You will lose all your sense of smell
And then you might develop some ulcers, maybe
'cause you're not eating well
Gums may recede, and all your teeth you may lose
gumming your food
And you may see the police everywhere
you're paranoid, fool

(Instrumental Break)
{during instrumental break - In the background there is a knocking sound on door - in two separate sequences with "Open up" voice in background following each one}
~ [Main character looks out the door after the 2nd knocking sequence - no one around - speaks] ~
("Wha...? There's no one there...?")

Here's some really good sh*t, man
just roll up your sleeve, yeah,
fantastic rush
Right after the hit you'll be vomiting
toilet, do flush
It'll f*ck you up, man; right off the meter
your brain; now mush
It'll get you off, man; it's the real thing [you won't care]
it's real good dust

Say, man, why are you talking to no one?
It appears your brain's out to lunch
That gram you slammed is making you goofy; you're raving
must have been too much
Slave to your need, you whole life floats in that spoon
over real soon
Lifeblood, it bleeds – and now you're down on your knees
your life is in ruins

(Instrumental break)
{this time with one repeat of the "knocking', but no "other" voice after it}
~ [Main character speaks] ~
("There's still no one there...?...")

Habit to feed, and feeding time is real soon
it will be soon
Maybe some speed; stuff will jack you up, ooh
you're so whacked out, dude
Drop LSD, and you'll fly over the moon
you'll be cuckoo
It's plain to see that this is no way to be
Well, that much seems true
Shot up your dreams, there's nothing but ashes left
it may be your doom
It seems to me that all your chances you blew
I'd say you're a fool...

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 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   11
 11
 11
 

User Comments

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Adagio - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Paul, this is so very thought-provoking. I like the parody! 5's
Paul Robinson - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Pat ~ ~ ~
alvin rhodes - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
chockful of nightmarish scenarios...i love it...5s
Paul Robinson - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
thanks, alvin ~ ~ ~
John Barry - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
A thoughtful, cautionary tale. 5s
Blue Ant - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
I agree with JB...this was nicely put together.
Paul Robinson1 - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks JB & Blue Ant ~ ~ ~
Rick C - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Great job, Paul. I lost a sister to heroin. These nightmarish scenarios are just the tip of the iceberg...555
Paul Robinson - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Ouch! That makes this pretty close to the bone for you, Rick...yeah, I knew some folks who are no longer around now from some of this stuff, too...
Johnny D - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Paul, I kid you not, sir --- your parodies consistently make me laugh-out-loud-for-real more than anyone else's ... and this one's no exception!
Paul Robinson - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
I tell you, JD, it's gotta be that "1950's/born in Connecticut" thing...no other logical explanation...this one today is a little strange in that it can be taken as very serious but also go the other way and get some laughs...I recorded a voice over-lay that's very much got a melancholy feel to it...but, yeah, with different intonation and emphasis...OH...I've got one up for tomorrow that should be good for some guffaws & hee-haws without any hesitation...think you will like it...Thanks for stopping in ~ ~ ~
Dominic L. - July 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Great parody! Pacing is PERFECT (According to my memory).... The line:"Pukin' in the sink, man, this junk is good. ", made me laugh. Keep it up! Man I wish my anti drug parody was better...
Kristof Robertson - July 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Black humour at its best. 555
Paul Robinson - July 26, 2005 - Report this comment
Dominic L -- Thanks, wish I could take full credit for making that one up but actually it's one I recall hearing an actual junkie say at some party about 35 years ago...I guess I tucked it away in my memory until I started to write this...Kristof - yeah, Black humour, indeed. Thanks...lighter fare for tomorrow, I promise...
AFW - July 26, 2005 - Report this comment
I think I'm addicted to this...
Paul Robinson - July 26, 2005 - Report this comment
AFW - Thanks ! I started a "12-hoof" recovery program this morning with a lighter piece...

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