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Song Parodies -> "Don't Want a Taco"

Original Song Title:

"Mr. Roboto"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Styx

Parody Song Title:

"Don't Want a Taco"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

I would eat anything for lunch, but I won't eat that...no, I won't eat that.
Mess is gonna follow, don't want a taco

Mess is gonna follow, don't want a taco
Please don't talk up the taste
You don't want what follows, pass on the taco
I want to keep this shirt white

I'm hungry, yes, I am (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
Must feed or else I'll crash (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
But in spite of all that (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
Standards are still intact

Not gonna eat it, don't go buy it, there's more options
You're so insistent, my blood is boiling like my tongue will get
Not one for spicy food, so spare me your diatribe
"Just be a man, try something new 'cause who knows what you'll find"
Don't give me that shite, that dumb macho tripe
Know what I like and it sure ain't spice

The taste is just one of my real problems with your choice, you see
Recall I told you that I want to keep my t-shirt clean?
Prefer a hero, more standard sandwich to control the flow
Of all the damn sauce and loose lettuce, I can keep a strong hold
I need a strong hold to keep my control
But the taco? Shape's wrong, insides fall

Why not a nice rib rack (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)?
A pizza, I'd eat that (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
Your turn to choose, but see (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
It's still not fair to me

Need something to swallow, don't want a taco
Want no taco, want no taco
Not that hard to follow, don't want a taco
Want no taco, want no taco
A huge mess will follow if we have tacos
Hard to get a hand hold on the damn taco
Will fall in my lap, gross, no fan of tacos
Will destroy my back hole, don't want a taco
Please don't be an asshole, just don't like tacos (dude, just give it up, don't want a taco)
No matter the combo, I pass on tacos (don't want 'em for lunch or dinner, it's the truth)
You like 'em, that's grand, though I still hate tacos (come on, just give it up, don't want a taco)
It's our lunch, not just yours, so nix the tacos (know what it means "to share"? Most have when they were two)
How much must I say so? I don't want tacos (hate you, hate you, hate you)
You say "Oh, come on, though", dude, they're just tacos (I really hate you)
Can have them on your own time, all the tacos (I hate you)
I"m still on a hard "no", don't want a taco (oh-oh-oh-oh-oh)
Ee-ya-ah!

It sucks that I can't leave
To get my own lunch, see
You are my only ride
My car's too dead to drive

Deliver? Can't do that (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
Phone's past the data cap (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
Hence why I beg you, please (eat it, eat it, I gotta eat shit)
Don't force your choice on me

Your shit choice, shit choice
Shit choice, shit choice

Definitely prefer the burrito. Much tidier. Also I can't think of this song without thinking of Todd in the Shadows' review of the album it came from.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.0
How Funny: 4.0
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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 5   3
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User Comments

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Agrimorfee - November 16, 2020 - Report this comment
Amusing enough. But it took me 2 verses to understand why you were concerned about stains on your T-shirt and not in your underwear. Next time, use soft taco shells. :D

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