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Song Parodies -> "Crap (Ode to the Garage Sale)"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Crap (Ode to the Garage Sale)"

Parody Written by:

Mike Armstrong

The Lyrics

It's summer time, and you know what that means... garage sales are out in full force, here's to hoping you don't find anything that's mentioned in this song.
Crap on the tables outside, Garage Sale!
Tonka Truck that only has its front 2 wheels, caked in mud
Crap in the cardboard boxes, Garage Sale!
Wedding dress, worn back in 1970, cost ya 20 bucks

Old football cards, a pogo stick too
It's missing Miss Scalet, but we're selling "Clue"
The tag is there, to show you the price
Just buy some Pogs, or those fuzzy dice

Crap on the tables outside, Garage Sale!
Power Wheels, it's rusty and it ain't been charged since '94
Crap scattered all through the yard, Garage Sale!
Billy Bass, that lacks a fin and only sings Kumbayah

There's crocheted blankets and knitted socks
16 letters of alphabet blocks
There's "8 Minute Abs" and good 'ol "Buns of Steel"
An old waffle iron, a rod with no reel.

Crap on the tables outside, Garage Sale!
Picture frames, and piggy banks, a rocking horse that is askew
Crap on the driveway it's true, Garage Sale!
Puzzle books and Precious Moments ornaments held tightly by glue

Dishes and Gak, a rusty old trumpet
This bureau will fall apart when you bump it
Your feet will never fit inside these boots
I doubt you'll want this green leisure suit

Crap! Crap! Garage Sale!

45's by Jim Croce, James Taylor, and Gordon Lightfoot
Crap! Crap! Garage Sale!
Hardy Boys and Boxcar Children, anything by R.L. Stine
Crap's piling out to the street, Garage Sale!

Slip 'n Slide and Super Soakers and other aquatic toys
Crap that we will never sell, Garage Sale!
Coffee pot that eats the filter, please get it off our hands
Crap, everything must go, Garage Sale!

Huffy Bike, missing 3 gears and lacking a kickstand
Crap, we'll try again next year, Garage Sale!
The price is falling straight down to the ground
Oh well, we tried, you get what you found!

It's crap!

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   1
 5   2

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Wild Man - June 02, 2003 - Report this comment
Loved it 5's
Billy Florio - June 02, 2003 - Report this comment
now wait a minute....I dont mind you saying all the stuff I was planning on selling at my garage sale next week garbage, but did you really have to make fun of three of the greatest singer-songwriters ever? And no one in their right mind would be selling their 45s...(if you are, I want them) lol...great great great parody guys!
Mike (Mike Armstrong) - June 03, 2003 - Report this comment
I agree that they were talented guys, Billy - their syllables fit with the song :), so they were used, perhaps unfairly so. Thanks for the comment.
Meriadoc - June 03, 2003 - Report this comment
LOL! I would be thrilled to find a copy of "Boxcar Children" at a yard sale!
Jeff Reuben - June 03, 2003 - Report this comment
Good job Mike, I enjoyed this! Although I wouldn't go selling the Super Soaker, unless you upgraded to the XP4000.
lebeiw15 - June 07, 2003 - Report this comment
Great parody... sounds like stuff I would buy
Larry Laffer - April 22, 2004 - Report this comment
Green leisure suit? Everyone knows the only color for those is white.
Agrimorfee - May 03, 2004 - Report this comment
ABC Comp..Pacing problems, but pretty funny. 354.
Johnny D - May 03, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Great rhyme and imagery.
Rick D - May 03, 2004 - Report this comment
I loved this Crap.
Adagio - May 04, 2004 - Report this comment
99% of the stuff at garage sales is crap, but you never know when a little gem of a deal might turn up...maybe that's why I like good parody for ABC - May 05, 2004 - Report this comment
Holy crap! (That's what you buy at the pope's garage sale.) Lotsa good lines here - my faves were the ones about Miss Scarlet and "16 letters of alphabet blocks."
Yakko Warner - May 06, 2004 - Report this comment
How much is the garage itself?
Meriadoc - May 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Pacing was rough, but the humor more than makes up for it. Hard song to pace anyway.
Peregrin - May 07, 2004 - Report this comment
Loved it! The TonkaTruck and Mud line really set the scene!
Loosekanen (The Armstrong) - May 07, 2004 - Report this comment
This song.... I love this song. Mike didn't tell me about this contest... I'm deffinitely involved now. lol. Yes.. there are pacing issues... alot, but I just loved doing this. This was the last true cooperative in-room parody by Mike Armstrong. We were laughing so hard for a few hours straight. Several things didn't make the cut. lol. I appreciate any and all comments on all our songs, but since this one holds such a special place... thanks to all of you.
Claude Prez - May 13, 2004 - Report this comment
I voted on this a long time ago but never commented; I like it even better this time. I'd quote some fave lines but Spaff already mentioned 'em.
neminem - May 15, 2004 - Report this comment
Have some 4s.
Paul Robinson - May 16, 2004 - Report this comment
(ABC) Mike - DKTOS, I'll see if I can find some audio to check this one out with.
Michael Pacholek - December 09, 2004 - Report this comment
How did I miss this one? And a bargain, too1

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