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Song Parodies -> "Beach It"

Original Song Title:

"Beat It"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Michael Jackson

Parody Song Title:

"Beach It"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

The Giant Panjandrum was a massive, rocket-propelled, explosive-laden cart designed by the British military during World War II. It was one of a number of highly experimental projects that were developed by the Admiralty's Directorate of Miscellaneous Weapons Development (DMWD) in the final years of the war. The DMWD had been asked to come up with a device capable of penetrating the 10-foot-high, 7-foot-thick concrete defences that made up part of the German Atlantic Wall along the French coast. It was further specified that the device should be capable of being launched from landing craft since it was highly likely that the beaches in front of the defences would act as a killing ground for anyone attempting to deliver the device by hand. Sub-Lieutenant Nevil Shute calculated that 1,016 kg of explosives would be needed in order to create a tank-sized breach in such a wall. The delivery method for such a quantity of explosives posed a significant problem, and one of the concepts discussed ultimately resulted in the construction of the prototype "Great Panjandrum". The proposed device was composed of two gigantic wooden wheels, ten feet in diameter with steel treads a foot wide, joined by a central drum fitted with the explosive payload. It was to be propelled by sets of cordite rockets attached to each wheel. It was predicted that when deployed with a full 4,000-pound (1,800 kg) load, Panjandrum would achieve speeds of around 60 mph (97 km/h), simply crashing through any obstacles to reach its target. Test devices were tried from Sept 1943 until Jan 1944. All failed due to the rocket propulsion system with no real steering mechanism. Panjandrum once launched tended to travel only a short distance before the rockets sent it off course or turned it over. A dangerous device, it was abandoned as impractical...
The Nazis thought that they had nothing to fear
They built the Atlantic Wall over many years
D-Day is approaching and the target is clear
So Beach It, Just Beach It

Do a test run, test the Giant Panjandrum
Designed to carry explosives, fast as it can
A rocket propelled cart, rolling along the sand
So Beach It, make the Germans get mad

[Chorus]
Just Beach It, Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
Germany must be defeated
Show ‘em just how crazy is your fight
A rocket rolling drum, quite an odd sight!
Just Beach It, Beach It
Just Beach It, Beach It
Just Beach It, Beach It
Just Beach It, Beach It

They're out to fight you, better test while you can
This is the latest toy, the Giant Panjandrum
Keep British troops alive, make a big explosion
So Beach It, Just Beach It

You have to show them that you’re really prepared
Hit the Atlantic Wall, two tons at sixty mph
Must break through, send the troops through,
Hit the bunkers up there
So Beach It, make the Germans get mad

Just Beach It, Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
Germany must be defeated
Show ‘em just how crazy is your fight
A rocket rolling drum, quite an odd sight!

Just Beach It, Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
Germany must be defeated
Show ‘em just how crazy is your fight
A rocket rolling drum, quite an odd sight!
Just Beach It, Beach It,
Just Beach It, Beach It
Just Beach It, Beach It,
Just Beach It, Beach It

Just Beach It, Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
Germany must be defeated
Show ‘em just how crazy is your fight
A rocket rolling drum, quite an odd sight!

Just Beach It, Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
Germany must be defeated
Show ‘em just how crazy is your fight
A rocket rolling drum, quite an odd sight!

Just Beach It, Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
Germany must be defeated
Show ‘em just how crazy is your fight
A rocket rolling drum, quite an odd sight!

Just Beach It, Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
Germany must be defeated
Show ‘em just how crazy is your fight
A rocket rolling drum, quite an odd sight!
Just Beach It, Beach It
Beach It, Beach It, Beach It
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/06/05/article-1191038-05399E17000005DC-268_634x342.jpg http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/e4/The_Great_Panjandrum.jpg/300px-The_Great_Panjandrum.jpg http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2009/06/05/article-1191038-0539A79E000005DC-210_634x423.jpg

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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WCJ - August 22, 2011 - Report this comment
Wow! No wonder they beached it! Great job! 555! :-)
Rob Arndt - August 22, 2011 - Report this comment
A crazy British idea, but they had crazier... like the Habakkuk Ice Cube Carrier (actually made of Pykrete), the Ublo bubble machine, the D-Day Funnies, the PIAT, sticky grenade, Hoopla UCAV, etc...

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