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Song Parodies -> "The Buntline"

Original Song Title:

"Borderline"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Madonna

Parody Song Title:

"The Buntline"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Watching the new SyFy series "Wynonna Earp" I immediately noticed the Earp Buntline Special myth continues. Although Earp was supposedly given a 16" barrel version by dime novelist Ned Buntline and reduced to 12", Earp never used that piece, especially not at the OK Corral in 1881. He carried a Smith & Wesson Model 3 in .44 Cal. First cartridge pistol adopted by the US Army.
Something in this Western story cannot be
Wyatt Earp's pistol has become part of mythology
Can't tell the guns apart?
It's really not that hard
When you track the liar down
Who cares what Buntline wrote?
Support for Earp's ego
Spread this legend all around...

Just try to understand, Earp was just a man
Despite tales of Dodge City (and Tombstone)

(Chorus)
The Buntline, was not on hand at the time
Can't face the fact that Ned just lied, time-after-time

[repeat chorus again]

Smith & Wesson was his baby
Model 3 came in so handy
8" .44 had nothing to do with the Buntline!

Earp, Basset, Masterson, Tilghman, Brown got one each
Ned Buntline handed them out for publicity
Guns did wow the crowds, but they were cut down
16" to 12" were bound
Earp put his away, "hard to jerk" he'd say
With Peacemakers he'd sometimes play

Just try to understand, this story is a sham
Little facts, just inaccuracies!

(Chorus)

Now gun's back on TV
"Wynonna Earp" fighting demons and zombies
Back to Purgatory armed with great-grandfather Buntline!

This all boils down to fantasy
And falsified history
Earp's main gun was never the Buntline
Novelist had everything to gain, to make outrageous claims
Tale keeps on spinning free
Earp's main gun was never the Buntline
Note: Earp's Peacemaker was a Colt Frontier Model in .45 with 7.5" barrel. He had and used many guns, but the Buntline was a gift only good for target shooting!

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 5

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