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Song Parodies -> "Desperate Michael"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:

The Eagles / Linda Ronstadt

Parody Song Title:

"Desperate Michael"

Parody Written by:

Steve Kalafut

The Lyrics

After reading the flack about Linda Ronstadt getting the boot in Las Vegas because the dedicated the song Desperado to Michael Moore, I realized that the song would work better as a criticism of him. Pronounce "desperate" with two syllables ("des-prit"), and accent the wrong syllable of "Clinton".
Desperate Michael, why don't you come to your senses?
Well your false accusations are getting old now
Oh and you're a liar, making misrepresentations
The things that you're sayin' will be shown wrong, and how

You misquoted Condoleeza leaving out part of her context
She said Saddam was not involved in Nine-One-One
Now you say a Saudi lobbyist has influenced the Bushes
But you left out that he also met Clinton

Desperate Michael, you say you're just like us workers
But you don't know hunger, you're rich and so fat
And freedom, oh freedom, yes that's why we are fighting
Osama would kill you, now how would you like that?

Showed a false Iraq in the pre-war time
To Saddam's bad deeds, Mike, your eyes are blind
Why don't you count the people he had killed?
And you say that cap'talism's bad
Ain't it funny how you love those dollar bills?

Desperate Michael, why don't you come to your senses?
Conspiracy theories about Carlyle Group
They own Loew's Theaters, the outfit showing your movie
You've really given us a doozy
Given us a doozy
You've really given us a doozy
So low did you stoop
The Saudi lobbyist is Prince Bandar, who has been trying to influence US administrations, of both parties, for decades.

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 3.6
How Funny: 3.6
Overall Rating: 4.0

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   1
 4   1
 5   2

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Johnny D - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Politics aside, this is a clever, sharply-written parody. Good job, Steve!
Dee Range - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
555 Well done, and thanks for presenting the rebuttal to the blow hard so nicely.
Arwen - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Good job...5s!
Royce Miller - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Steve, bravo.
Phil Alexander - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Very much what JD said - especially as a Brit who's not seen the film yet - this was a very sharp, punchy criticism
John Jenkins - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Excellent parody, Steve. It was definitely clever to use "Desperado" to make your point - which is basically that the term "Michael Moore documentary" is an oxymoron.
Cond'ohleeza - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
Sorry, Steve, can't get behind anything remotely in favor of that stupid tw*t Condi.
MrMacphisto - July 28, 2004 - Report this comment
4's for craftmanship, effort, and humor. Good song, but I still prefer the Michael Moore types over the Bill O'Reilly ones.
Michael Pacholek - July 29, 2004 - Report this comment
Fives on talent, ones on politics. Michael Moore has more honesty in his left lovehandle than in all the members of the Bush family AND the Saud family combined. If I were President -- and, since I turn 35 between the election and the Inauguration, it will soon be at least Constitutionally possible -- you know how people say, "When the revolution comes, you're first on my list?" Well, Prince Bandar bin Sultan will be the first head on a stake outside the Summer White House in Point Pleasant Beach.

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