The summer's come along again,
It's getting hot again,
And the A/C's still disapproved of;
Maybe it was time again,
Start thinking again
Of another summer's getaway
Just splashin' along--
As in Wisconsin Dells, in case you don't know....

The city gets sticky
And it gets quite hot,
Even with a fan to deal with the same;
"Character building"
Is the reason we've given
Against air-conditioner use;
Hence, just splashin' along,
As in those Wisconsin Dells wasterslides....

And let's not forget about
The idiot's lantern
Of Diogenes, and how it can get
Rather predictable
And yet so annoying;
Hence, all the more reason we'll be
Just splashin' along
To those waterslides of Wisconsin Dells....

Well, it's about time that you got away
Before the courts declared you insane;
It's so much better to relax
Than to drive yourself insane....

But might I just recommend
That you need to spend
Some time discovering what made
Those Dells first famous
And made all so famous--
None other than the scenery
While just splashing along,
Trying to understand those Wisconsin Dells....

And some would find the place crazy
And a bit on the weird,
Not to mention rather hysterical
With all the shoobies around
Come the summertime
Trying, for the most part, to escape the heat
Just splashin' along
Even in the wavepools of Wisconsin Dells....

'Cause who needs Branson in the first place,
With their music shows of jingoist bent?
Now you're makin' some waves
Up where The Fun Comes Naturally....