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Song Parodies -> "Spilling My Coffee"

Original Song Title:

"Killing Me Softly"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Roberta Flack

Parody Song Title:

"Spilling My Coffee"

Parody Written by:

Rick Cormier

The Lyrics

Frivolous lawsuits are a plague to the court system here in the US. Everybody's a victim of something....
I heard they made good coffee
I heard they were in style
And so I hit the drive through
And in a little while
They handed me a foam cup
And then I drove away-ay

Steering my car with one finger
Dialing my phone with my nose
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
'Cause they spilled my coffeeon my hands

There were no signs that I saw
Warning I could get burned
This is, for them, a costly
Lesson to be learned
I had no way of knowing
So I just kept right oh-on

Rolling up windows with elbows
Driving with both my eyes closed
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
'Cause they spilled my coffeeon my hands

Five million bucks should do me
The lawyers got their share
A new idea came to me
I think I'll dry my hair
A new way in the morning
In the microwa-ave

Set cruise control with my kneecap
Reading a book as I drive
Spilling my coffee on my hands
Spilling hot coffee, burned my hands
Suing their asses with lawyers
They made me spill coffeeon my hands

Yeah, it was way too damned hot
Yeah, it was hot enough to burn
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, owwhoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh
Whoa-oh-oh, whoa-oh-oh
Spilling my coffee..on my hands

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.9

Total Votes: 36

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   1
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   2
 1
 0
 
 5   32
 34
 35
 

User Comments

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Dumb Ass Kid - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Forget parody of the month, this is my parody of the day! Fantastic stuff, Rick, you truly are a master of words 555
Johnny D - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
I especially love the lines that describe the stupid things the driver is doing... "Steering my car with one finger ... Dialing my phone with my nose" ... "Rolling up windows with elbows ... Driving with both my eyes closed" ... "Set cruise control with my kneecap ... Reading a book as I drive"
Silly Willie - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Spilling some 5's on you
Billy Boyd - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
True and funny. Great job, Rick. 5's
Kristof Robertson - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
A work of art, Rick...especially the choruses. 555
alvin rhodes - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
my favorite of the day..i laughed so hard i spilled MY coffee
Dee Range - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Hilarious from start to finish. A true masterpiece, and definitely SOTM worthy. Great lines EVERYWHERE.
Jeff Reuben - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Excellent, I can certainly relate. Sign Arwen up for the video, she's a natural for this one!
Arwen - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Rick this is FABulous...I have way too many favorite lines to pick one to showcase...but I agree that the choruses were the very best!! (and if you want me to star in the video, as Jeff said, I'd be happy to...but it's gonna cost you...; )..)
Phil Alexander - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS (other than the tagline), but DGAF, either. Great premise, beautifully executed.
Rick C - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Wow, thanks for all your kind words. Arwen, WHAT is it gonna cost me to have you in the video? Do Elf Princess, Divas of Divinity even drive?
John Barry - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
These anatomical descriptions are hiliarious!
AFW - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Finely engineered spoof spotlighting the nonsense of these litigations.
Arwen - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, one sure way to get me to do some pro bono work is to call me a Diva of Divinity...=)
Red Ant - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
I cough-feed up a 555 for you.
Inferno714 - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Dude, that was so awesome. It's said that suing is what Americans do best, and you pretty much summed it up right there! 5s all the way, my man!
Rick C - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you, Red Ant and Inferno714.
Rick C - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Phil, I think the coffee you spilled was D-GAF-einated.
Stuart McArthur - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
yeah, beautiful Rick - reminds me of when Kramer did it on Seinfeld - should sue the car-makers next for not installing airbags to protect you from such mishaps - 555
Rick C - June 02, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Stu. I don't remember that episode but, I'm a big Kramer fan!
Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - June 03, 2005 - Report this comment
I'm told that the heat of the coffee is to cover up the lack of strengt of taste, I'm surprised that it can hurt anything. (We're talking about Starbucks here, aren't we?).
Rick C - June 03, 2005 - Report this comment
Peter, I'm not sure it was Starbuck's. I remember hearing about a settlement a couple of years ago against one of the fast-food chains. I think it may have been McDonalds, actually. Anyway, this person burned themselves while driving and drinking coffee. The lawyers claimed there weren't warnings about the potential of hot coffee to burn. The jury found for the plaintiff and awarded millions. Lack of common sense doesn't even come into question in many of these lawsuits.
Cryptic Wizard - June 03, 2005 - Report this comment
This parody had me laughing so hard, I think I gave all fives but I was laughing so hard I'm not sure where I clicked. Awesome job.
LucidLupin LeeBee - June 06, 2005 - Report this comment
555s - great - everyone else has said it all ;-) Thanks also for the comments at mine
Rick C - June 09, 2005 - Report this comment
Thank you and, you're welcome Cryptic Wizard and LucidLupin LeeBee
Tim Mayfield - July 13, 2005 - Report this comment
5's Wonderfully written. This would be a great recording!
dawnsister - July 25, 2005 - Report this comment
Unfortunetly the lady who sued McDonalds won...pretty sad, huh? Awesome job.
Red Ant - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-S05) Wow, what a lame pun I used before! Great work with SGLTM (Several Great Lines to Mention). This sounds like many *cough* tourist *cough* drivers in VA.
Agrimorfee - December 01, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) I echo Red's use of the acronym SGTLM. 555
Stuart McArthur - December 04, 2005 - Report this comment
(S) see above - yes, unaccountability is a HUGE trend, Rick, and great parody fodder - excellent
Dominic L. - December 05, 2005 - Report this comment
DKTOS, but funny read.
Johnny D - December 10, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) See above!
Larry Hensley - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC- Really funny
Scathe - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Frivilous lawsuits are one of those satire worthy aspects of society. Well done.
Adam Eccleshall - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) OK, I give up... where did you get the tape of my driving test??? Excellent song :-)
Arwen - December 11, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC--I think I liked this even more this time around...it's just SO freaking hilarious!! Great Great GREAT!!!
Jeff Reuben - December 12, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC: Story of my morning life :)
minger 123 - December 29, 2005 - Report this comment
it was wicked- i played the original and sang along with this version, i know it sounds as if i'm a saddo but u should try it if u havent yet!
filvvle_brothelite - August 18, 2006 - Report this comment
This is brilliant. I couldn't stop laughing.

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