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Song Parodies -> "Always The Programmer's Fault"

Original Song Title:

"Another Brick In The Wall"

Original Performer:

Pink Floyd

Parody Song Title:

"Always The Programmer's Fault"

Parody Written by:

Tim Mayfield

The Lyrics

ALERT: Techie parody!!! This is a tongue-in-cheek look at amateur programmers and their mistakes.
Specifically the problem of dividing by integers without converting to the float data type.
In C, if you divide 5 by 2, you get 2. In Basic, you get 2.5 because Basic will automatically convert the type.
Oh, and modulo is like saying remainder, so 5 mod 2 = 1.
I don't need to write in fractions
I won't work with pi at all
I round my numbers to the digit
And from there mistakes snowball
Pro-grammer! Get a brain installed
Don't use "C", you know you might give Borland a call
Don't you see, I've made another ex-decimal

I don't like complex equations
My results, can't use at all
Didn't process the modulo
Shouldn't use me for payroll
Pro-grammer! I make numbers whole
Don't use "C", because production grinds to a halt
Don't you see, always the stupid programmer's fault

"Wrong! Code it again!"
"If you don't change to FLOAT, you can't do INT division.
How can you do INT division if you don't change to FLOAT?"
"Dude! Oh, dude don't try to fake it, switch to Basic!"

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.4
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   2
 5   7

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Phil Alexander - July 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Lovely, Tim :-) But... how can you do INT division if you DO change to float?
But a great idea for a song title, very well executed. Thinks...

I can't handle float division
I only use div and mod
All my numbers get trucated
Makes the numbers rather odd...
Oops... answer's rather odd
To be sure, yes it's all the programmer's fault...

...come to think of it, you can have lots of fun with this as a song title, can't you:
Got a Microsoftish program
Looking cool and really flash
But then when I click this button
Oops.. the damn thing's gonna crash
Jack DeRippa - July 15, 2005 - Report this comment
"Pro-grammer! Get a brain installed!" = genius. All 5's.
Paul Robinson - July 15, 2005 - Report this comment
Well, I don't know a whole lot about programming, Tim...but I can see that rounding numbers off - especially too soon - would cause TONS of problems...that much simple logic would dictate. And it reads/sings real clean...So - I'm rounding off some "5's" for you here ~ ~ ~
Red Ant - July 15, 2005 - Report this comment
What Paul said.
Adam Eccleshall - July 16, 2005 - Report this comment
int vote[3] = {(int)5.000,(int)5.000,(int)5.000};
Tim Mayfield - July 16, 2005 - Report this comment
Phil, yes, I had options :)
Jack, thanks
Paul and Red Ant, thanks. No one said beginner programmers use logic. Adam: thanks for the vote, even if it is the same old subroutine. Reminds me, Array of sunshine: string bikini [,,] sunshine = {"beautiful girl","beautiful day","smiling face"};

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