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Song Parodies -> "Cats On The Label"

Original Song Title:

"Cats In The Cradle"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Harry Chapin

Parody Song Title:

"Cats On The Label"

Parody Written by:

Guy DiRito

The Lyrics

About once every few months I'll see a story on the news where some wacko is sharing his home with a few hundred cats and dogs. Thought I'd write a bit about that. http://www.nola.com/news/t-p/metro/index.ssf?/base/news-4/1093069620177570.xml
Some barely alive, some are tan and gray,
Some came off the streets, just the usual stray.
There are no mice to catch, they ran away,
The urine shock as they wiz and spray.
And it was shockin' when you'd view it and hear them mew,
It's sad what some people do, yeah,
You know it's sad and oh so true.

The cats on the label are a grey Maine Coon,
American Blue and some breed from Khartoum,
Pretty's how they're shown, cats,
On cat food cans, but then you got the litter pan, man
You gotta clean the litter pan.

Then one spawned ten just the other day,
They will soon start to crawl but they won't go away,
Because each one you know, they are here to stay,
They make a lot of doo, but then what the hey.
How they live that way, it's a style mighty grim,
I couldn't live like them, yeah,
You know I couldn't live like them.

There's cats on the table crappin' on the spoons,
Kitty cat poo, 'bout to make you swoon.
Overrun the home, cats,
Are ten by ten, story's on the news again, yeah,
Their showin' it on "Prime Time Ten".

The cat on the cable's dancin' to a tune,
Little joy stew, eeeyew, boy what a fume.
Smellin' up your home,
It is just one tin, when you gather ten times ten, son,
You're gonna need a clothes pin then.

Well, the neighbors acknowledge, there's no other way,
They don't like this man, so he should not stay.
There's a cloud of pew, all this sh*t is so vile,
They shook their heads and they thought for a while.
What we really need now is get rid of this turkey,
Wait 'til later and we'll all have fleas.

This cat is unstable, he's a total loon,
Little cuck-oo, hey this man's looney tune.
Run him out his home, on
His way we'll send, so we're all together then, yeah,
So we're all of just one mind then.

The house caught on fire, the cats ran away,
The call for help was a bit delayed.
They said, hey, that's too bad see ya around some time,
They said we loved your cats all hundred forty nine.
You see when you are an asshole and your cats are pee-yew,
They won't think twice dealing with you, yeah,
They won't think twice dealing with you.
And all the dung with that home got the third degree,
It burned up so nice-ly, yeah
Oh boy it burned nice-ly.

The cats on the label are a grey Maine Coon,
American Blue and some breed from Khartoum,
Pretty's how they're shown, cats,
On cat food cans, but then you got the litter pan, man
You gotta clean the litter pan.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.5
How Funny: 4.5
Overall Rating: 4.5

Total Votes: 17

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   2
 2
 2
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
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 5   15
 15
 15
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Royce Miller - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Guy, I think this person you're talking about is living a few yards over from me
Adagio - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Guy, so sad when you hear of this, but I really loved your parody!! 5's
Guy - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Oops - Seems I wrote one too many chorus verses. Oh well, no extra charge. I missed this when I submitted last night.

Thanks Royce and Pat and the unknown voter for not dinging me on this.
John Barry - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Great title; great job. Some Bay Area psycho just had about 70 feces-encrusted dogs removed from her 1,000-square-foot house.
Johnny D - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Internal rhyme, pacing, humor, and syllable-by-syllable rhyming to the corresponding syllables of the original song.....this one's got it all, folks, come take a look! 5-5-5
Dee Range - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
I've been in a house just like this, and a clothespin wouldn't work. Super glue the nostrils shut, that's the ticket. Great song, Guy
Mari D - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
Guy, you really tell it like it is! And I really enjoyed it! As far as lunch, however...
alvin rhodes - August 27, 2004 - Report this comment
beautiful job on this one...best one i read today...bravo !
Meriadoc - August 28, 2004 - Report this comment
I had 18 cats once (all outside but 4), a dog, chicken and a cockatiel. ;-)
Kelly - August 30, 2004 - Report this comment
I Loved it !! One of the best parodys I have ever seen! Kudos
Storm the Albatross - June 04, 2018 - Report this comment
We used to have small dog that would sit in the cat the cat would turn the dog on its back and lick its belly the dog also liked to drag the cat by the tail

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