Just a little while ago
in Double-A ball, you know
I treated myself to this guy's hell
and the gopher balls that he'd throw.
On the River Delaware
in Trenton, I couldn't bear
in an effort to make it clear to who
ever what it's like when he's pitching
left standing on the mound
and the sound of fans all straining
"My God, he sucks, we blew ten bucks.
No point in him remaining."
And to Triple-A he was called
and the fans there were appalled.
Gone long on Henn, naturally.

To think that only yesterday
I left the old U.S.A.
I went in a pinch to see the Yankees clinch
in Toronto against the Jays.
But as if to knock me down
reality came around
and without so much as a mere touch
batters knocked Sean Henn to pieces.
Leaving me to doubt
talk about Joseph Paul Torre.
Why did you start that young upstart?
Tell me, what's the story?
Sox lost, the clinch we need
but the Blue Jays' bats were freed:
Gone long on Henn, naturally.

It seems to me that there are bullpens far off in the world
we should be sending
this guy who's rending.
See that ball go.
See that ball go.

(instrumental break)

Gone long on Henn, naturally.

And looking back over the hurts
at guys like Tanyon Sturtze
I remember how I stewed when Scott Proctor blew
and Farnsworth set off alerts.
And at 26 years old
he troubles my Pinstriped soul.
Out in Anaheim, pitching like a crime.
Now in Detroit, gopher-balling.
Leaving me to start
parody 'bout games so broken.
Despite my pleas for his release
those words were never spoken.
Carlos Guillen swung away.
That's why I'm mad today.
Gone long on Henn, naturally.

Gone long on Henn
naturally.