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Song Parodies -> "The Math Whiz"

Original Song Title:

"The Actor"

Original Performer:

The Moody Blues

Parody Song Title:

"The Math Whiz"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

Song 10 in concept parody In Search of the Lost Nerd
I’m certain Pi is pretty keen,
With functions touted happily,
Arrays behold, I do devise,
There stands the math whiz who is me.

The sweeping powers make me smart,
Through limits, integers, don’t sneer,
Derivatives I have down pat,
I shape a graph, I have no peer.

My vectors are not lame,
Differentials I do frame,
For there’s tangents we need know,
And the only root I know sums so feasibly.

The sine is preferred by math fellows,
I’m a smart teen, it’s not that hard for me,
They’re on caffeine, they scrawl the answer key.
Ah, ah, ah.

I’m such a brainy math buffoon,
With points and circles ev’rywhere,
Astounding gifts I do assume,
My mind is reeling calcs, I swear,

It’s such a pain with theorems,
It gets so hazy from the thin flow,
Your mind fries, numbers fall from space,
The ruler that you slide is slow.

My fields have no name,
But there’s no proof I can’t game,
And there’s no set apropos,
And the cone that used to grow, comes with certainty.

The signs are absurd, but I’m mellow,
I’m a math king, I like Descartes so free,
Oh I’m starting to scrawl on my elm tree,
Refined, I’m a nerd, happy fellow,
Oh, imparting Euclid Geometry,
Oh, oh, charting, you’re not as smart as me.
Ah, ah, ah.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   4

User Comments

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Fiddlegirl - July 31, 2009 - Report this comment
I'd actually have to agree that I'm not as smart as you! Not at the moment. Though you may be assured that, in real life, there's really no such thing as algebra. :)
alvin - July 31, 2009 - Report this comment
5 X 3 = 15
Timmy1000 - July 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Thanks Alvin. Fiddlegirl, I'm not that smart - a real math whiz would probably tell me my math jottings don't make much sense.
3.1415926535 - July 31, 2009 - Report this comment
Now, THIS is my kind of parody!
Christie Marie M - July 31, 2009 - Report this comment
3n = 15 where n = 5!!!
Tommy Turtle - August 01, 2009 - Report this comment
@ Fiddlegirl: Wearing an algebra when swimming or diving keeps the seaweed off your chest. :) And along with "algorithm", it's another one of those pesky t*rr*rist "al-" things, like distilling al-cohol, that were invented in Persia while the West was in the middle ages. They did more than just al-qaeda or al-jazeera :-)

Christie Marie M: That's a tautology. :)

Timmy1000: I'm a bit late here, but wanted to share a few thoughts with you. They're my own opinions, humble or otherwise, but definitely only mine. I can't speak for the site or for anyone else.

I've limited myself to posting not more than two songs per day, for two reasons:

1) I think it's unfair to other writers to hog the home page and crowd out their songs. I've said as much publicly, in a parody footnote, when our two most prolific writers were each posting 10-15 songs/day in a race to hold the #1 spot on the author list. There's no site rule against it or anything, just think it's discourteous. IMHO -- YMMV.

2) I think it's unfair to my readers, some of whom have been loyal for more than three years. I wouldn't want to impose an "obligation" on them to read more than two songs from me. I know that I'm not the only author on their "A-list", and that they want to read their other fave writers and other interesting-looking songs as well. Time is not unlimited for any of us, alas.

I can remember only two exceptions to the above: Once posted a genuine trilogy in one day. By "genuine", I mean that it wasn't just three spins on the same OS, it was three parodies *with the same subject matter* on the same OS -- like your "Part 1 - Part 2" post on Friday. They were really all one theme and one song, and besides, it was a mass tribute to about 18 writers, so I thought they should all get their props on the same day. The other time, I had already submitted my two for the night, when I heard of the death of one of my favorite musicians. I quickly worked hard to put out a tribute and get it in so that it would appear the next day, as the news spread. (So did AFW, and we ended up both doing the same title switch LOL. Great minds think alike, and so did ours :-)

My time is limited, too. I like a lot of your work. However, if *anyone* mass-posts, I put them at the end of the list to read, or if time runs out, they get skipped. If I do have time, I'll pick one, or at the most two, to read. I haven't the time to read ten songs from every, or any, author, and perhaps some others don't, either. Plus, I don't want to encourage such mass posting. Not that it's my job to police the site, but it's my opinion and I'm entitled to it, as is everyone else entitled to theirs. Just explaining my thinking and actions. Again, YMMV.

I liked the song, being a math whiz myself -- well, formerly. Forgot all that multivariable calculus and stuff a long time ago. But how would a teen today know of a "slide rule"? lol! In simple arithmetic, 555, and for another take on math,,
although various symbols don't come out correctly on various browsers. Cheers!
Timmy1000 - August 02, 2009 - Report this comment
TT, I understand your comments, but these were all posted the same day because it was a concept parody (all songs relating to the same theme), similar to Moody's concept for the Lost chord album. Also, some ideas flowed from one song to the next, if you looked at the songs in the order they were on the original album. For example, at the end of Mouse of Poor Dorks, there is a line about the last dork going into Amiright, which then flows into Veggin' of a Kind, about Timmy1000, notorious overposter on Amiright and his unsteady mind (so guess who the last dork is). This was to try to get the feel of original where the Moody's go in the last door and next song is about Timothy Leary, kind of showing what door they were in or trip they were on. I was considering putting all of it as one song, but that would have way too long. I also posted in order, but alas, they came out in different order. I've had about one other post in the last month, obviously working on this.
TT - August 02, 2009 - Report this comment
T1k, I understood it was all related, but perhaps it could have been a daily series? Hopefully, the opening day's episode or two would have hooked some readers, esp. if your intro tells peeps that this is a 10-part series spread over the week. Two episodes each day, M-F -- probably would have gotten a lot more readers, IMHO.

Re: order: there is, AFAIK, no relationship between order of submission and order of posting. I've seen that from loooong experience. I expect the admins/editors spread out multiple posts across the list, rather than bunch them, and It's probably asking a bit too much of them to read your (and every) post for subtleties as you describe. Workaround: Do Part 1 and Part 2, as you did, so peeps know from the home page what order to read them in. Tuesday, add to the titles, Part 3 and 4 etc., so on Fri, 9 and 10.

I've done far too much plugging of myself this week -- shame on me -- so not gonna link this, but when one of my fave singer/songwriters, Gene Pitney, passed away, I posted 9 parodies of songs written or sung by Pitney, at the rate of one or two per day, and with some "Part" numbers in the title as needed. It went over pretty well, so perhaps that idea might work for you if you do another such ambitious project. Regards. ...btw, DK the LC album; mostly know of "NIghts" and a few other top hits -- so the concept wouldn't have resonated here as well as it should have. I. e., I wouldn't have been able to do it justice in appreciation, all else aside. Regards, T.

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