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Song Parodies -> "I Am a Lon"

Original Song Title:

"I Am a Rock"

Original Performer:

Simon & Garfunkel

Parody Song Title:

"I Am a Lon"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

I sprint away; as off creeps the dark, me’s sentient.
I have far roamed,
Peeping into windows, not to see the show
But to flesh-eat, maul ’em, bite ’em, mouth bestow.
I am a Lon; I am a wild thing.

I scale walls, my “forks” in deep for biting—
These canines penetrate.
You have to bleed from rend-drip; rend-rip causes pain;
I’m lapping up the lusciousness; you’re drained.
I am a Lon; I am a wild thing.

Don’t talk of lunch!
I’ve had GERD from girls before—
From eating in a menses spree.
I will disturb your slumber
By feeding on your side:
It’s a fleshy lunch once I have stretched your hide.

I am a Lon;
I’m not a ’pire thing.

I never cook.
When the potpourri’s dissected,
I am eating raw your arm, sir.
Why I’m not entombed, you ask ere your doom. . .
A tough-bone crunch, then bone-brunch tonguingly.

I am a Lon;
I am not smiling.

But a Lon can be tamed:
Gat with argentine—I die.

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 LittleLots
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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 3

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   3
 3
 3
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

~WindyWitchyWoman~ - October 26, 2009 - Report this comment
~ S L U R P -- 0 N ~ sirSweaty, Le Marquis de A la Mode . . .
LilWestyWitch - October 26, 2009 - Report this comment
. . . Pirate Jack, ~Le Duke of A la Mode~ are you related to Lon Chaney ?
blackjack21 - October 27, 2009 - Report this comment
Another well-crafted gore fest.

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