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Song Parodies -> "Bad Swiss 2"

Original Song Title:

"Last Kiss"

Original Performer:

J. Frank Wilson

Parody Song Title:

"Bad Swiss 2"

Parody Written by:

John A. Barry

The Lyrics

It’s hot air about neutrality. . .
they had open arms for Nazis.
They’ve got great admen, and their PR is good—
They pulled the wool over eyes of many in this world.

It’s true, there’s a good taste in those chocolate bars;
they’re much better than those from Mars
In watches they’re far ahead;
in cuckoo-clock business they have led.
They did naught to stop the World War II fight,
but dealing with Hitler was alright.
They turned eyes from the camps and gas,
treated SS to a repast.

It’s hot air about neutrality,
unless you stretch semantically
and allow henchmen into your neighborhood.
And now they’re the bankers to drug cartels of this world

So we awoke and this is what we found:
if you have gelt, they want you around/
They don’t care; they avert their eyes
as to the source of that handsome prize
The lust for bread is running through their head. . .
Gandhi, Putin—if you’ve got a pile,
they want that dough; it’s bliss for the bad Swiss—
no matter where you got it, your ass they’ll kiss.
They run a con; and the place is sealed up tight,
with ill-gotten wealth rife. . .no light
is there or air on the secrecy
They hoard gelt for kleptocracies.
They’ll fawn for henchmen who are not any good.
They’re insular and take in wealthy thieves of the world.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

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    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 4   0
 5   2

User Comments

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Patrick - March 25, 2014 - Report this comment
The Gun Culture holds the Swiss up as an example of a nation that was not invaded because of its citizen army. I suspect your parody is more likely correct. The Nazis and everyone else needed a place to park their pilfered loot and spy on each other's agents. The Swiss were far more valuable in that role than they would have been as conquered territory.
Rob Arndt - March 29, 2014 - Report this comment
Switzerland (like Spain and Argentina) helped the Nazis, so no need to invade. Franco was a fascist too and the Swiss were German-speaking accomplices in shady dealings with Reich stolen assets. In the last year of the war, the German U-boats on secret missions ported in Spain and likewise the Swiss helped to smuggle the Zuse Z-4 computer over the border and into their banking system postwar. Argentina allowed masses of Germans to escape and settle in their nation and aided the SS in protecting Nazi war criminals. It also allowed U-boats to be replenished that were operating in the S Atlantic/Antarctic waters. The US and Britain pressured Argentina to declare war on Germany in March 1945 for no other reason than to be able to inspect Nazi subs that did not surrender until months after VE-Day. These U-boats carried Reich technology and information about super-secret Nazi movements of assets. Postwar, Argentina asked for several German aeronautical specialists to come there to help with advanced aircraft, but the nation was weak and not heavily industrialized. Argentina also claimed to have tried to make a fusion weapon with German help, but the facilities might have actually been used for further testing of the missing Bell Device. Sweden was a neutral too but helped the Nazis with strategic iron ore shipments. In 1945, the US and Britain pressured them too and so Germany set up V-4 missile ramps on Misdroy aimed north to strike if they joined the Allies. The V-4 by Henschel was a ramjet extended range cruise missile in development- parts of which were captured by the USSR- explains the mysterious Ghost Rocket phenomenon coming from that area immediately postwar.

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