-> "The Unicorn Throng"
Original Song Title:
"The Unicorn Song" (MP3)
Parody Song Title:
"The Unicorn Throng"
In these times right now, there is mirth to be seen
in the beliefs of some people; they’re often a scream.
Some sane folks exclaim, “Gee, this is in need of reform
because these people believe in unicorns!
“OK, green alligators and long-necked geese,
the humpty-backed camels and the chimpanzees,
and cats and rats and elephants every day are born.
But these people do believe in unicorns!”
It’s magical thinking, and it seems to gain
among some who could be clinically insane.
In this case, victims believe that to think is to do;
Their “thinking” is askew.
They do not believe facts and figures—it’s thought’s surcease.
Facts frighten them; only fantasies will please.
Those facts detract. “Irrelevant!” They view ’em with scorn.
But they believe in unicorns.
Ready to roll when conspiracies call,
with the armies of paranoia, they are prepared to fall in.
They’ll march in lockstep to those loose a screw.
If they believe something…it’s true!
Scared or bored by
clear-eyed straight thinking. Strong fallacies
they’ve clung to untrammeled—like astrology.
To fact-redact is hella fun; and science is scorned.
Instead, belief in unicorns.
Reason they’ve thrown out because it causes pain;
something must have short-circuited in their brains.
Up memes and web schemes delusions are shorin’.
Whoa! this is a loony corps.
There are meme agitators that long to please
with trumped-up “facts” rammed into their heads with ease.
Closed their eyes, minds are closed; in their brains they’re storin’
magical thinking, like there’s unicorns.
This arc of “thought”’s moving enlightenment aside,
and unicorn belief’s just one wave in the tide.
When reason floats away and fantasies are holding sway,
people then start to believe in unicorns and other cray cray.
Lately we’ve seen an alarming and wrong-thoughts increase—
junk science untrammeled; reason has decreased.
“Alt-facts” some rap; they’re hella nuts and are stokin’ the storm…
create fear in believers in unicorns.
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