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Song Parodies -> "Pet"

Original Song Title:

"Wet"

Original Performer:

Snoop Dogg

Parody Song Title:

"Pet"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

A simple case of a man looking to adopt a pet...OR IS IT?!
Cat or dog?

It's a simple offer, please don't pass it up
Want to rub you down, I know you'll lap it up
Watch you eat a bunch, eat a bunch of fresh treats all day
You deserve me, earned me showerin' with praise
Don't stick your nose where it should not be in
I'll have to tell you off, a concept that won't click
Do it again and again, I'd exclaim your name
But it's okay, I'd be glad you came

Do you wanna be my pet?
Want you to be my pet
Do-do you wanna be my pet?
Cause I wanna have a pet, pet, pet
Lick, lick, lick, lick your own butthole
Please don't lick, lick, lick (do that, I'll be leavin')
Lick (ah), lick, lick (ah), lick (ah) your own butthole (ah)
Please don't lick (ah), lick, lick (ah) (do that (ah), I'll be leavin' (ah))
Pick a, pick a, pick a dog or cat

I want to have lazy days, sl-slow down
Where-where you flop ri-i-ight upon the ground
You don't need to work, I found
That I feel the same way now
Your head in my lap and your spine curved round
It's the best known method to calm do-o-o-own
When a cat gets purry (mew)
Or when a dog stops the blurry
Runnin' round, that's right when my brain's less hurty
Don't even care if my shirt gets dirty
Afternoon, the mornin' or when I'm in bed
What I'd love best is a cuddly, little, little, little pet

Hope you can be my pet
Do-do you wanna be my pet?
Really wanna have a pet, pet, pet
Shit, shit, shit, shit where I want you
Please just shit, shit, shit (don't want bonus leavin's)
Shit (ah), shit, shit (ah), shit (ah) where I want you (ah)
Please just shit (ah), shit, shit (ah) (don't want (ah) bonus leavin's (ah))
Pick a, pick a, pick a dog or cat

Can I, can I pick you up? Or should I go and shirk that?
Don't wanna make you get all rough and then hurt ass
I can't really take the pain, though if I've not made it plain
All of my pet requests had diff'rent aims
Yes, my intent was to have you lie on my floor
Cause it feels good when I act bad to a babe, so
Mu-ust I, must I-I, I apologise
For solicits-its when I've been lookin' you right in the eye?
It's been locked in your heart, love
Girl, let me prop up what you've shut up, ay
Ev'ry night, ev'ry day clickin' on subversive links
Diff'rent chicks, diff'rent days, I ask in diff'rent ways
Where you goin'? What'd I say?
You knew where I was goin', you've got a sharp brain
Mind is workin', must be workin' cause you need, yes, you need
Lots of intelligence in-in order to take care of pets

So you should be my pet
Do-do you wanna be my pet?
Yes, I wanna have a pet, pet, pet
Skip, skip, skip, skip all the lawsuits
You should skip, skip, skip (you should not ask questions)
Skip (ah), skip, skip (ah), skip (ah) all the lawsuits (ah)
You should skip (ah), skip, skip (ah) (you should (ah) not ask questions (ah))
Shit (ah), shit, shit (ah), shit (ah) where I want you (ah)

My original idea was going to be a double-meaning sorta thing, where it could be taken both as a cute pet story or as something for more...singular interests, but two verses in I realised it was too fluffy so I had to go for the twist-ending approach.

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Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 2

Voting Breakdown

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