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Song Parodies -> "Botched Start 101"

Original Song Title:

"Rockstar 101"

Original Performer:

Rihanna ft. Slash

Parody Song Title:

"Botched Start 101"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

On your marks...get set...g-no, not now, you fools!
Our time's been, our time's been
Our time's been wasted, wwwwasted
Uh, uh, our time's been wasted (uh-oh)
Uh, uh, our time's been wasted (uh-oh, oh)
Our time's been wasted (uh-oh)
Uh, uh (oh-oh-oh), our time's been wasted (uh-oh)
Uh, uh (oh-oh-oh), our time's been wasted (uh-oh, oh)
Uh, uh, our time's been

Lined up at the blocks (ah), waitin' for the crack (ah)
Of my pistol (ah) here at this track (ah)
Hands on rubber (ah), well, a mock-up
Don't know much about this stuff, but you're crouched there, bottoms up (ah)
Soon we'll be findin' who's faster, but wait
You're not meant to be movin' 'til the gun sound is made
My finger's not twitched and yet you're still runnin' far
Once more, we're resettin', this is such a farce

Had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we're resettin' (resettin')
My mind (my mind)
May not take (not take)
More shite (uh-oh), cause we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, your legs keep twitchin' (keep twitchin')
I'd like (I'd like)
To not waste (not waste)
More time, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Ey-ey-ey

Dipshits runnin' (ah), big fit's comin' (ah)
You're lucky I've not kicked ya (ah) ass straight out of the runnin' (ah)
You need to wait for this (ah), we all agreed upon
By "we" I mean the whole runnin' bus'ness for eons (ah)
Cryin' out (ah) loud, cut it out
Yes, you're jumpin' the gun, that joke's over and done now
The crowd's gettin' pissed because you twitched and ran far
Twenty times resettin', this is such a farce

Had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we're not movin' (not movin')
I've tried (I've tried)
To set straight (set straight)
Your minds (uh-oh), cause we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, muscles keep twitchin' (keep twitchin')
I cry (I cry)
Please restrain (restrain)
Your thighs, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Ey-ey-ey

He-e-e-ey, I'm gonna start a fight
If this stretches through tomorrow
And if all the fans riot, that's fine
Got sportin' crap they can borrow
All set to start a fight
With no kind of sorrow
Cause you twits can't sit tight on the line

Had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we're redoin' (redoin')
Why try (why try)?
This whole day's (whole day's)
Drained time (uh-oh), cause we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, we've had a botched start (botched start)
Again, your butts keep twitchin' (keep twitchin')
I'd like (I'd like)
You to wait (to wait)
One time, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Dudes, can you stop it?
Dudes, can you stop it? Ey-ey-ey

I dunno why they went to the trouble of getting Slash for this song when it doesn't really sound like anything that couldn't've been done by any schlub with a pick and the right fuzz setting. Maybe I just haven't listened to enough G'n'R, who knows?

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