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Song Parodies -> "Potions Work"

Original Song Title:

"Broken Girls"

Original Performer:

Gabbie Hanna

Parody Song Title:

"Potions Work"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

A simple little parody about people who don't believe that magic potions are good in a fantasy setting. Totally standard, nothing metaphorical going on.
It's really rare to talk to someone (someone)
Who doesn't scream out all of their thoughts, buddy
Hate or love, "like" will never come up (come up)
That's never not been true, you'll have to trust me
"What is it this time?" Good question (question)
It really helps to focus on one subject
Don't want a sidetracked conversation (-sation)
But let's stop blund'ring 'round, let's just get it said:

Some folks are pissed, saying really ugly shit
About magical-type remedies (remedies)
"Death in a drink! Never know how long you'll shrink!"
That same old melody for forever, geez

Some say potions work but others hate how they're put together
Potions work, you can show them how you're feeling better
But no, you always see their hands begin to reach
Up to their ears to block you, they won't listen to you, buddy
Potions work, some people hate that, their brains are severed

The neutral tone I had is all gone (all gone)
But anti-potion types are kinda dipshits
"They've all got poison in 'em, that's wrong!" (that's wrong)
Amount is very teeny, some delete it

But they're still pissed, come out with more crazy shit
As it's now their whole identity (-dentity)
To freak and flip when you dare to take a sip
Wish their sincerity was for better scenes

Because potions work, whether for strength or for growing feathers
Potions work, they're not bogus 'cause you've put together
A pile of mad theories "They'll track you when you pee
And then they'll up and kill you when these lampposts are up, trust me"
Potions work, you hate that? You're wrong by ev'ry measure

Their hate for potions (stupidly pissed, they don't know what makes 'em tick)
Is total bogus (so very pissed, at the protest with their stupid posters)
Their hate for potions (enraged and pissed 'cause they simply don't know shit)
Is total bogus (that one wizard is a twit, lost his arcane focus, super bogus)

Magic potions work, so much research when they're put together
Potions work, they get recalled if there is an error
But they'll still swear at me 'cause they want so badly
To blame the magic that they don't get 'cause it scares 'em, buddy
Potions work, all their lame buzzwords don't make them clever

These are legit, gonna grow gills for a bit, potions work
It's not a trick, lotta testing goes in it, potions work
Their eye can twitch all it wants, it won't change shit, potions work
Magic potions work, I'm not gonna bow to dipshit pressure
Their hate for potions
Is total bogus
Their hate for potions
Is total bogus

This was originally gonna be just standard wizard-y stuff, then I had the idea to make it a steroid analogy, but then I immediately shifted gears to, well...anti-mag.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 28

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   26
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