We played ping-pong all night and I still beat you by five
So you challenge me to some more Xbox Live
Though I know you'll whoop my ass again
Can't look like a wimp in front of my best friend

It's been this way since we learned times tables in Maths
You beat me at something and then I beat you back
We keep doing this although we are best mates
And even when I lose real hard I still say that it felt great

When we wrestled, man, you sure beat me down
And when we kicked some balls, mine landed halfway down town
And who could forget Poker Night last June
I'll probably pay my debt
Sometime, not too soon

It's between me and you
We're quite the pair of tools
On the phone " Wanna have a round of golf with me?"
You'll get so excited, I'd get so scared
Ev'ry ball I hit will land over there

That's nowhere near the hole

As we brag on
We sound bitter
Claim that we both
Did it better
And it alternates
Who's the victor
We'll keep going
We're no quitters

Who will get the better job?
Who will make the more money?
And when we crack jokes
Which of us is more funny?

See, it's not just sports we compete at, it's ev'rything
Still try to see who gets the ball through the ring

We'll try to see who will be the first to hail a cab
'Cause we goin' to the beach to find a pair of big crabs
And then, we'll see who can cook theirs the best
Guess this rivalry will never rest

I wouldn't want it to

As we fight on
Lose our tempers
Who got more gifts
Last December?
But we are still mates
Still together
Friendly rivals
Since forever

La, la, la, la la la la la
La, la, la, la la la la la
Friendly rivals since forever (La la la la la la la la)

Who knows what we'll do tomorrow just to prove our worth
Maybe we'll test our knowledge
Of famous dates of birth

And if anyone asks when will this end
We'll think they're joking or just playin' pretend

Whoop my ass in something, I'll whoop your ass the next day
And more than once or twice, some have said we're strange
Just 'cause, we keep arguin' who's so great
They don't get it how we are still mates

As we rant on
Who did better
At collecting
Firewood timber
Some say we're so strange
Well, who gives a
Rat's ass about
Those dumb goobers

We still fight on
Who is clever
Who was born on
4th December*?
It's been this way since
We wore diapers
We've been rivals
Since forever

(those damn 'la la's' come back)

We will keep on
Betting higher
Who can sing well?
Who runs faster?
Our lives will not change
So whatever
We'll be rivals
For forever