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Song Parodies -> "The Baton Pass"

Original Song Title:

"The Salmon Dance"

Original Performer:

The Chemical Brothers

Parody Song Title:

"The Baton Pass"

Parody Written by:

the_conqueror_of_parodies

The Lyrics

Relay races! They're a thing!
Hello, boys and girls, those who are athletes
This here's recruitment for my real passion (it's the truth)
Today I hope to reach you and then pass on said passion
And speaking of "pass"

I want you to try this out and not just pass
I know you're gonna love it if you give it one chance
It's not complicated, it's not too hard
There's no heavy liftin' or hard aimin' parts
Run fast, there's nothin' to it, just one twist to find
Four people, one race, not at the same time
No, it's one quarter of the length of the track each
And then you've gotta hand a baton off when you meet

Right when you meet
I know you can do it, I know you can do it
Right then

Love to see the teamwork of sporty-type partners
Just pass a stick to the next partner
Wow, sounds uninteresting
But I argue: that frees the brain to then focus on one trial

Run and then hand the baton to the next person's hand
Then all you do is look further down the track
Hope that your friends are tearin' down like I shot their ass
Why's your jaw slackin'? Not legit, it's a joke, won't do that
Don't know why you're acussin', it's a crime to be shootin' kids
There's other ways to motivate a runner to move a bit
How the gold medal shines, all the hugs from the whole team
So who here wants to practice with a baton? Pass it to me

Pass that to me
I know you can do it, I know you can do it
Right then

If you drop it, that's a big problem, you're in for hell
Got to make sure to keep a good grip on that tin stick there (wow!)
You can't let that damn baton fly, might hit somebody's eye (uh-huh)
Or it could leave a real nasty bruise (from space, could see)
It's true, also it means the race, you'd lose now, it's true (right then)
Don't let go...what? You don't want to give this sport a crack?
You're kiddin' me! That's crazy, geez
It's not that complicated to hold a baton, it's not that threatening
It's just a small baton, it's a cinch to run and hold
Wow, you're so lame, you're so lame, huh? Whoa
Wow, hey, ssh, kids, hey, who else wants to g-grab this here baton?
Have fun and try the baton pass, huh, what do you say? Alright
Start running

Can't remember if I ever did relay races in school. Sure sounds like something that was potentially available for me to do on Sports Day that I passed on in favour of doing absolutely nothing because I hated P.E. Then again, that could be any sport, for obvious reasons.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 16

Voting Breakdown

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