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Song Parodies -> "How To Be Trashed"

Original Song Title:

"How To Be Dead"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Snow Patrol

Parody Song Title:

"How To Be Trashed"

Parody Written by:

Kristof Robertson

The Lyrics

Recent studies have named the Brits as the biggest boozehounds in Europe. Well, with a typical night out like the one described below, I'm not surprised! The references may be British, but the tale should be familiar to most. Youtube video here!.
Twelve pints of lager at the Dog & Duck pub
Then five hours of dancin' at the local club; but
Your head's spinning madly, so you're hugging a wall
Your stomach's flip-flopping- you might just lose it all
There's a sink in the men's room: splash cold water on face
Have a quick upchuck for luck, and now you're back in the race!
"Hey, sweetheart; you and your rack can come back...to my place"
[*slap*]

Bernie the bouncer says you can't have more beer
You disagree, so he grabs you- throws you out on your rear
There's an all-night kebab shop at the end of the street
Add extra chilli sauce to hide the taste of the meat
That little twerp at the taxi rank is giving you lip
As some Scottish bird performs an impromptu strip
And while her boyfriend pleads with her to stop...here's the cops!

Still feeling queasy as you stumble back home
And though you've lost your shoes, you've acquired one garden gnome
You try to find your car keys, and urinate on the lawn
You feed your cat a Mars bar, and watch some bad cable porn
And in the morning you'll swear to never do this again
That's when the hangover starts, and ev'ry whisper's a din
With a bucket close by your bedside....
It's goodnight...zzzzzzzz

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 9

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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User Comments

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stuart mcarthur - November 07, 2007 - Report this comment
and when their mother came in afterwards to check on them, she turned to Mr Gallagher and said "imagine what they'll both be like when they become teenagers"

you show impressive detail in your diary entries Kristof, but psst, you might want to keep some of that stuff private - 555
Matthias - November 07, 2007 - Report this comment
Don't drink and drive, or the Snow (Police) Patrol Cars will be on your tail. Intresting song choice Kristof.
alvin - November 07, 2007 - Report this comment
hmm....i'm gonna try this out as soon as possible
Jack Wilson - November 07, 2007 - Report this comment
This was awesome! 5s
AFW - November 07, 2007 - Report this comment
Sounds like one of my Friday nights in the old days...Capitol FUNNY
John Jenkins - November 07, 2007 - Report this comment
Clever wordplay.

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