Song Parodies -> Eating Out

Original Song Title:

"Bleed It Out"

Original Performer:

Linkin Park

  
Parody Song Title:

"Eating Out"

Parody Written by:

Porkbeard

Expressing the frustration one deals with when going out to eat at a fast-food restaurant during lunchtime.
Yeah
Here we go, another lunchtime
Fifty people in every line
Throwin’ up after you dine
Plastic furniture hurts your spine

Filthy trays, garbage juice
Specialty’s customer abuse
Clothes always sticking to these booths
Need Jaws of Life to get me loose

Truth is I don’t like this fare
Food always contains pubic hair
Fries smell like soiled underwear
Serve your burger charred black and chicken rare

Yeah, crowds keep pouring in
Late getting back to work again
Pack your lunch or order out
When it’s twelve o’clock again

I’m eating out, spend my lunchtime just enduring the wait
I’m eating out, risking my health on some food that I hate
I’m eating out, saturated fat’s increasing my weight
It’s increasing my weight, it’s offending my mate
I’m eating out

No! Line is slow
Stagnant water has better flow
Human cattle stop and go
Fat customer stepped on my toe

Doctor help me, I feel sick
Milkshake has made me triple thick
Greasy food has made my bowels slick
Nuggets become butt nuggets quick

Could be worse, I won’t lie
Isn’t exactly eyeball pie
Eating it won’t make you die
But neither will listening to Air Supply

So why try boycotting them
Still be late back to work again
Bite your lip and tough it out
When it’s twelve o’clock again

I’m eating out, even though I’m far from wasting away
I’m eating out, though I am well aware of the cliché
I’m eating out, throwing seven of my dollars away
Of my minimal pay, all my money today
I’m eating out

I’m getting oh so tired
Of fast food places!

I might get myself fired
IF I DON’T GET BACK NOW!!!

I’m eating out, all those toxins put my stomach in pain
I’m eating out, would be healthier ingesting cocaine
I’m eating out, hope one day to end the Burger King’s reign
Cut that McClown’s McVein, Wendy hit by a train

I’m eating out, don’t know many rhymes that I can create
I’m eating out, Bruce Willis was in the movie, “Blind Date”
I’m eating out, one plus one plus one plus five equals eight
Alexander The Great! Maine’s the 23rd state!

I’m eating out!

I’m eating out!

I’m eating out!
Copyright 2008
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Voting Results
Pacing: 4.6
 
How Funny: 5.0
 
Overall Rating: 5.0
 

Total Votes: 5
Voting Breakdown

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 5   3
 
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LittleCupCakes - April 22, 2008 - Report this comment
Every line rings so true, Sir! Loved the mention of Bruce Willis, as he is my favorite comedian, David Addison, in MoonLighting! I did see him in BLIND DATE with Kim Basinger. It was really funny!

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