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Song Parodies -> "If I Only Hadn't Stained"

Original Song Title:

"If I Only Had a Brain"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Wizard of Oz

Parody Song Title:

"If I Only Hadn't Stained"

Parody Written by:

Rick Cormier

The Lyrics

I don't know why I did this. It just kinda sneaked out.
If I Only Hadn't Stained

I'd have lots more pairs of undies
Enough for months of Sundays
If I could just restrain
Garbage man wouldn'a scooped "em
If I hadn't over-pooped "em
If I only hadn't stained

Coulda saved a bunch of bloomers
If I had noticed sooner
And for the john I came
I was so devil-may-care
That I soiled "em on the way there
If I only hadn't stained

Oh I wish I knew why
It's happening more and more
Skid marks running all the way from aft to fore
I throw "em out and buy some more

I'm still searching for the answer
A mess my underpants are
By now I should be trained
Didn't know fruit was loomin'
After all, I'm only human
If I only hadn't stained

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.8
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 31

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 1
 1
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   1
 1
 2
 
 5   29
 29
 28
 

User Comments

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Stuart McArthur - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
you've got a great way with rhymes Rick - loved the "the answer/underpants are" couplet - 555
alvin rhodes - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
funny as hell...nice job
Rick C - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Stuart, Alvin! I thought that, for my official, making the Amiright parody author listing 10th parody, I should do something classy.
Kristof Robertson - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Rick, for God's sake don't stop writing...you've got a real talent, and I look forward to enjoying more of your stuff....555
John Barry - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
I was expecting a Bill-Monica retrospective, but I laughed my pants off anyway. 15 pair.
Leo Jay - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Very likely the cleverest poo-related parody ever!
Red Ant - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Virtual UPS package to Rick Stainier from Runny Ant: Enclosed are 555 new pairs of underwear.
Arwen - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
I have to admit that I don't hit all the poop parodies on the site...but I'm glad I didn't miss this one! Very well written!
Rick D - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Your name being close to mine, I was a little worried you might put some crap on here that people would think was me. Not worried anymore, I think I have a kindred spirit joining us. Here's the evidence: http://www.amiright.com/parody/70s/johndenver29.shtml
Rick D - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Now that you've hefted our, I mean, your name onto the list, you'll notice it just zooms up with each parody until you near the top, when it becomes like pushing a rock uphill. You can put in a bio after 25, and when you pass my wife Mari, and my buddy Dave Chrenko, check out some of theirs. I had the idea that you live on the east coast, possibly near our Johnny D? I have a particular interest in people here who also dabble in recording, as you do. We may have to have an internet lunch together here.
Rick C - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks, Kristof, John, Leo, RA, Arwen and Rick D. Yes, Rick D, I'm on the east coast. I'm only about 8 miles from where Johnny D lives. Internet lunch sounds good but, there's always too much spam.
Dumb Ass Kid - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Wierd... although I despise poo parodies, this is excellent. 555
Rick C - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks DAK! I'm not a big fan of them either.
Johnny D - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Ewww, yuck, but well-written! Rick C, so you're in Woburn, correct? Do you ever go to live theatre? My wife and I are planning to go out to Uxbridge on Saturday to see a friend of ours perform in a community theatre out that way. If you're interested in going to the show as well, I can point you to the website where you can get tickets (real cheap, it's amateur). If we get together, we should be sure to snap a few digital pictures for "The Parody Writers' Photo Thread" over on the messageboard.
Rod Worden - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
Very funny and well written, Rick! Liked the "Didn't know fruit was loomin" line. Three more 5 inchers.
Michael Pacholek - April 14, 2005 - Report this comment
All right, all right, I'll give you a five! Don't get your shorts in a bunch! Especially since you've already got a bunch in your shorts! (Now THAT, "Ms. Longstocking," is an acceptable poop joke.)
Guy - April 15, 2005 - Report this comment
I like this shit. 5s.
Leo Jay - June 30, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) And to think, 'mr. critic' thinks all poop parodies are sh*t...
Adagio - July 02, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05)Hilarious, Rick! 5's
Agrimorfee - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC05) This is a great parody....for me to poop 5;s on!
Red Ant - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(I-05) See above!
Rich Kapalin - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) So many great lines here, couldn't pick just one!
Arwen - July 06, 2005 - Report this comment
ABC--still really funny, Rick...=)
Vice President dip Cheney - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment
I don't like it. And Guy's April 15 comment should have been censored.
Mikey Squirrel - July 07, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Very funny. Maybe you should .. well.. Shout it out?? http://www.amiright.com/parody/80s/tearsforfears32.shtml Tri-Fives.
Jake A Ralphing (Luke Brattoni) - July 08, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Hilarious stuff, Rick. Great rhyming, too.
Stuart McArthur - July 11, 2005 - Report this comment
( I ) - especially loved the last verse, Rick
Johnny D - July 11, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) I like this shit too. You tell 'em, Guy, YEAH !! With ya 100% !!
Scathe - July 13, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC-I) Nice spoof. It's a little gross but I've read worse.
Adam Eccleshall - July 16, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Not overly fond of toilet-related humour, but this was funny
Ethan Mawyer - July 17, 2005 - Report this comment
Pretty good for a poop song. Now writing about staining other people's clothes... that would've crossed the line.
martha - July 17, 2005 - Report this comment
another stain parody .. Arwen has started a trend
Jeff Reuben - July 17, 2005 - Report this comment
When I read the title, I thought "I hope this is to the Wizard of Oz tune" You didn't let me down. Hilarious, and great title for the song!
MysteryGoat - July 18, 2005 - Report this comment
(ABC) Pretty good, I liked the "fruit loomin" part the best.
the Vice President again - July 19, 2005 - Report this comment
People, if you really need to cuss, please be courteous and censor your profanity with astericks, like this: s**t. Or better yet, use a euphemism, like crap or doodoo.

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