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Song Parodies -> "The Deals on Replacement Vehicle Do Abound"

Original Song Title:

"The Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"The Deals on Replacement Vehicle Do Abound"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

In 2011 an order was placed for a DARPA project to replace the Humvee. This resulted in two different directions. Local Motors came up with an all submission public design of which 150 of the best elements were incorporated while a latter contract was being considered for Oshkosh Corp. The private venture was completed in 9 mos as the XC2V FlypMode which looks like a less intense desert Batmobile vs the JLTV more military type successor to the Hummer. The contract was won by Oshkosh for 17,000 initial batch with a $7 billion contract. Limited FlypModes have gone to underground bunkers with garages as a post-apocalyptic scout!
The deals on replacement vehicles do abound
Two were found
Safe and sound
The Hummers are now to be scrapyard bound
Some ISIS found!!!
(23,000)

The prices go up and down
Two options found
Shared design allowed
DARPA sure did shop around
JLTV vs XC2V for now

The XC2V more than a Jeep
Chevy 6.2l LS3
High HP, torgue, and speed
Long-travel A-arms, hydraulics troops need
(With)
LT315/70R17s

JLTV is a soldiers best wish
Easier to fix
More armor, better weapons mix
More capable, versatile, really kicks
Can recover, rebound!

17,000 from 2018
Important deadline to meet
Much harder to defeat
$100 billion if conditions it meets
300,000 Hummers standin' down!

From the beginning the Hummers were doomed
Blown-up, went boom!
Light armor, lacked room
Gunner with .50 up top filled with gloom
Insurgents all around!

IEDs were bad, bad, bad
Spelled death for the recon lads
Drove the troops mad
Larger armor too expensive, sad
Not enough to go around!

German armor hevyweight dimissed
GEFAS wanted, troops were pissed
IEDs countered (signal triggered)
Congress tried to keep indigenous
A solution to be found

Now our troops have two
Both of them are new
Oshkosh JLTV is approved
FlypModes moved underground
(When foreign missiles head inbound)!

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
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 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   10
 10
 10
 

User Comments

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Rob Arndt - October 26, 2015 - Report this comment
JLTV: https://g.foolcdn.com/editorial/images/155256/osk-jltv_large.jpg
Rob Arndt - October 26, 2015 - Report this comment
FlypMode: http://wordlesstech.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/Flypmode-prototype-for-DARPA-3-620x413.jpg
Rob Arndt - October 26, 2015 - Report this comment
German GEFAS:
http://www.army-technology.com/projects/gefas/images/1-gefas-vehicle.jpg
Batgeek - October 26, 2015 - Report this comment
Interesting, but WHO gets to drive the Batmobile version???
Rob Arndt - October 26, 2015 - Report this comment
Probably recon scouts, I'd assume! Me personally, I would keep a GEFAS instead. Looks like a modern SdKfz 251 but all-wheel instead of half-track! Has EM to counter IEDs...
Jonathan - October 26, 2015 - Report this comment
Oshkosh? M'Gosh! 5's
Rob Arndt - October 26, 2015 - Report this comment
My first reaction as well!

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