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Song Parodies -> "Thirteen Days Of Christmas"

Original Song Title:

"Twelve Days Of Christmas"

Original Performer:

Traditional

Parody Song Title:

"Thirteen Days Of Christmas"

Parody Written by:

Airfarcewon

The Lyrics

On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me
A cartridge in the left knee

On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Two choking hands, and a cartridge in the left knee

On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Three knife wounds, two choking hands, and a cartridge in the left knee

On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Four body slams, three knife wounds, two choking hands
And a cartridge in the left knee

On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Five poison pills.... four body slams, three knife wounds,
Two choking hands, and a cartridge in the left knee

On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Six karate kicks, five poison pills.... four body slams,
Three knife wounds, two choking hands,
And a cartridge in the left knee

On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Seven hits of hurting, six karate kicks, five poison pills....
Four body slams, three knife wounds, two choking hands
And a cartridge in the left knee

On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Eight flights of falling, seven hits of hurting, six karate kicks,
Five poison pills.... four body slams, three knife wounds
Two choking hands, and a cartridge in the left knee

On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Nine crushers crushing, eight flights of falling, seven hits of hurting,
Six karate kicks, five poison pills.... four body slams,
Three knife wounds, two choking hands,
And a cartridge in the left knee

On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Ten bombs a' ticking, nine crushers crushing, eight flights of falling,
Seven hits of hurting, six karate kicks, five poison pills....
Four body slams, three knife wounds, two choking hands,
And a cartridge in the left knee

On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Eleven rattlers rattling, ten bombs a' ticking, nine crushers crushing,
Eight flights of falling, seven hits of hurting, six karate kicks,
Five poison pills....four body slams, three knife wounds,
Two choking hands, and a cartridge in the left knee

On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
Twelve jaws a' jawing, eleven rattlers rattling, ten bombs a' ticking,
Nine crushers crushing, eight flights of falling, seven hits of hurting,
Six karate kicks, five poison pills....four body slams, three knife wounds
Two choking hands, and a cartridge in the left knee

On the thirteenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me
A funeral, what else?

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 LittleLots
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 12

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   12
 12
 12
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Peter Andersson a.k.a K1chyd - December 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Ehh... I guess wishes for a happy new year would be an abuse of good taste and totally out of place here... but then again, maybe not! :-)
Yoidy - December 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Excellent. Kind of reminds me of that movie I Love You To Death, or Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Love is Fatal! 555
Jack Wilson - December 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Your wife watches TOO many horror movies...LOL 555
AFW - December 25, 2006 - Report this comment
Thanks, Guys....and Merry Christmas
Meriadoc - December 25, 2006 - Report this comment
A perfect Christmas parody...
Below Average Dave - December 26, 2006 - Report this comment
Wonderful way to end the XMas season. . .555 (or maybe 666) LOL
Michael Pacholek - December 26, 2006 - Report this comment
Here's your fives, too bad you didn't live to received them!
alvin rhodes - December 26, 2006 - Report this comment
well, that was one was neatly wrapped up with a bow
Andria - October 28, 2009 - Report this comment
LOL at the whole thing... I was almost too cracked up to vote and leave a comment. As stated above by someone else, it is reminiscent of horror movies. OK, considering the end, maybe it's reminiscent of a snuff film. 5s to you, and I hope you pull through the health problems you've been experiencing and come out the other end of the hospital a healthier person.
~BellaNoPain~ - October 28, 2009 - Report this comment
Sir L"AIR de Farce. ~Le uke 0Reign au Pain~ I see that your are quite ~DaveEsque~ in your desire for p a i n . . . .

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