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Song Parodies -> "The Great King Edmund (Edmund II of England)"

Original Song Title:

"The Great Pretender"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Platters

Parody Song Title:

"The Great King Edmund (Edmund II of England)"

Parody Written by:

Andy Primus

The Lyrics

1015 - King Canute of Denmark invaded England.

1016 (April) - King Ethelred II (Ethelred the Unready) died and was succeeded by his eldest surviving son, Prince Edmund, who became King Edmund II (Edmund Ironside).

1016 (October) - Canute defeated Edmund at the Battle of Assandun. Canute forced Edmund to sign a treaty in which Edmund would rule Wessex (South of England), and Canute would rule Mercia (the Midlands) and Northumbria (North of England). When one died, the other would rule all of England.

1016 (November) - Edmund died and Canute became King of England.

1536 – 1541 Dissolution of the Monasteries. Most of the properties belonging to the monastic orders were seized and sold by King Henry VIII but some were destroyed, including Glastonbury Abbey where King Edmund II was buried.


(Late 1015 – Early 1016)
Oh yes…he’s the great Prince Edmund
He’s fightin’ some guy who’s a brute
Though full of pluck
He will need some luck
His foe is that Dane, King Canute

(April 1016)
Oh heck…now his dad expires
An’ leaves Eddie all of his land
As king, ‘tis rough
Coz the Danes are tough
The hides of the Brits will be tanned

(October 1016)
They fight on some site that is now unknown
Dane might is a fright; Brits are soon put to flight

(October 1016)
(Oh) heck…Eddie’s lost his England
Not laughin’ today: he’s so down
The Danes won’t quit
So his realm is split
In Wessex, he still wears a crown
But, elsewhere, Danelaw will abound

(November 1016)
Surprise, when Ed dies an’ Canute is king
Unwise to despise, for you’ll meet your demise

(1536 - 1541)
(Oh) then…in the reign of Henry
The wealthy ol’ monks make him fume
On them, he’s tough
He destroys their stuff
Some abbeys, an’ graves, go ka-boom
And Edmund’s is one of the tombs
(Of the tombs)



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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.8
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 2   0
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 3   1
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 4   0
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 5   9
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User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Fives for doing a parody with "Edmund" in the title and it's not about a sunken ship.
Bruno - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
5's from the middle of Danelaw land (East Midlands). Novel and informative. I like it.
Patrick - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
A fun way to learn history. They should teach it that way in school. Which is the way history was taught when Canute was king.
Andy Primus - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks to Michael P, Bruno (I'm also East Midlands) & Patrick
Tommy Turtle - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
@ Michael Pacholek: LOL! You're on a comment roll today!

Andy: You may not know it, but you're following in the footsteps of the great Merry & Pippin, who did many parodies explaining otherwise-obscure bits of British/CW and surrounding history and culture, via parody. Of course, none of us Yanks know any of this, so keep 'em coming.

I liked best the internal rhyming that so perfectly followed the internal rhyme structure of TOS lines:

They fight on some site that is now unknown
Dane might is a fright; Brits are soon put to flight .... 555
AFW - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
You make world history very entertaining...great job...
Susanna Viljanen - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
A nice piece of history again! The Anglo-Saxon period in English history is usually passed on a couple of sentences in the school history, and you wrote a good one. 555
Andy Primus - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks TT - I can remember seeing some of their educational parodies from when I first started posting (3&1/2 years ago). I haven't seen their names around here for quite a while now (which is not really surprising, as this was my first posting in over 3 months).

Thanks AFW - I try to

Thanks Susanna - I learned very little about it as well (in the UK school system), but over the years A-S history has become my main interest out of my many hobbies - I've been studying it for over 30 years now).
Meriadoc - August 04, 2012 - Report this comment
Poor Edmund - he only gets a sentence or two in the history books. Probably because he only got a sentence or two in the Anglo-Saxon Chronicle.

After Edmund's death, his pregnant wife and young son fled England. Second son (Edward Aethling) was born abroad (probably Poland) and was raised in Russia and Hungary. Around 1064 Edward the Confessor had his half-nephew fetched home from Hungary, but he died shortly after arriving in England (possibly by a messenger of death sent by Bill the C). The Aethling's daughter Margaret eventually married the King of the Scots, and their daughter married the Conqueror's son Henry I. Most Brits probably don't realize it, but Edmund's blood still flows in the Royal veins.
Andy Primus - August 08, 2012 - Report this comment
Thanks Meriadoc.

From what I’ve read, I’ve always thought that Edmund would have made a much better king than his dad did. He certainly tried his best to save England from being overrun by the Danes. Do you know how Eadric Streona’s treachery fits into this story? I wonder how Edmund died. Considering it was only a month after his agreement with Cnut, it’s not hard to believe that he may have been bumped off.

I presume that you know about Edmund’s grandson, Edgar (son of Edward Aetheling & brother of Margaret), who was elected king at the age of about 15 after Harold II was killed at Hastings. He was the last Anglo-Saxon king of England and ruled for 2 months until he was abandoned by his supporters when William arrived at London. It’s lucky for him that they abandoned him because, if he had tried to remain king, he would certainly have been killed. He ended up dying at a very old age about 60 years later.

I’m amazed that you know the small details considering that, presumably, you’re American - because of the vice/vise spelling recently & your realiz(s)e above. You’re right, most Brits that I’ve spoken to about British history don’t even know the basics. I’ve got a brother named Stephen who, until I told him, didn’t even know that we had a King Stephen who ruled for nearly 20 years. I’ve spoken to many Scottish people who didn’t know that the Scots were an invading tribe that eventually dominated the native Picts.

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