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Song Parodies -> "Sixteen Grand"

Original Song Title:

"Sixteen Tons"

Original Performer:

Tennessee Ernie Ford

Parody Song Title:

"Sixteen Grand"

Parody Written by:

Patrick McWilliams

The Lyrics

Albert Snyder is the father of Marine Lance Corporal Matthew Snyder who was killed in Iraq. Albert Snyder sued the infamous Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka (Fred Phelps) for disrupting his son's funeral and was awarded a judgment of million against the Phelps crew. A Pennsylvania judge overturned the judgment and ordered the father to pay Phelps ,000 in court costs. The Phelps family is notorious for among other things, wrapping their children's shoes in American flags so they step on them wherever they walk.
Most people say America means Freedom of Speech
But picketing a funeral is a mighty long reach
When one brave father tried to take a stand
A judge ripped him off for sixteen grand

Sixteen grand, for a fallen Marine
A parody of justice that is truly obscene
Time to tell these judges they are not exempt
Hold these black-robed bastards in the highest contempt!

Fred Phelps and his hell-spawn like to wander the land
Spewing forth venom of their own private brand
Back in Pennsylvania he made out like a thief
Paid for trespassing on another man's grief

He got sixteen grand, for a flag in the mud
Like thirty silver shekels all covered in blood
I sure want to be there on the Judgment Day
To hear what Jesus really has to say

God Hates America! according to Fred
Who shows up at churches to dishonor the dead
Hear their treasonous rantings, this despicable clan
Is the US offshoot of the Taliban

Gave 'em sixteen grand, the court must be dense
What the hell ever happened to common sense?
Violate decency, you'll get an award
To keep spreading hate in the name of the Lord

Back in nineteen and twenty four the KKK
Went to Indiana, gonna have their say
They were scared sheetless and were put to shame
By the Fighting Irish of Nortre Dame

It's the same today, as it was back then
Bigots must be driven off by better men
Soldiers give their lives to protect me and you
And the next of kin have their rights, too
In 1924 a Ku Klux Klan convention in South Bend, Indiana was routed by local Catholics led by students from the University of Notre Dame. May God bless the soul of Corporal Snyder. The ACLU: for over ninety years, defending the rights of those who don't respect the rights of others.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.4

Total Votes: 5

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   1
 5   3

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - April 05, 2010 - Report this comment
Well-executed and to the point. The media is having a drooling field called "Christians" dishonoring America! All that remains is to tie Fred's hoard to the Tea Parties and everyone else who opposes the excesses of the Administration. ;D
Patrick - April 05, 2010 - Report this comment
The Tea Party is having a rally at the baseball stadium in Kansas City, Kansas on April 15. Phelps lives less than an hour away, so I wouldn't be surprised to see his crew there.
myron - March 13, 2011 - Report this comment
best explanation yet of where we are headed with all of this political correctness and loss of common sense.

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