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Song Parodies -> "I am the Very Model of an Angry Little Texan Man"

Original Song Title:

"I Am the Very Model of a Modern Major General"

Original Performer:

Simon Gallaher

Parody Song Title:

"I am the Very Model of an Angry Little Texan Man"

Parody Written by:

Rosemary

The Lyrics

This is a parody sung from the point of view of my favorite theorist of all things conspiratorial, Alex Jones!
I am the very model of an angry little Texan man
I’ve information ruinous of governmental master plans.
I know our history so well and I quote facts “historical”
I see connections everywhere; of course they’re categorical.
I’m very well acquainted too with matters architectural.
I understand jet fuel and fire would not make a building fall.
About conspiracy theorems I’m teaming with a lot’o news,
with many awful facts about the banks all run by the Jews.

I am very skeptical of all the government will tell us
I know they’re lying all the time and what is more they swear and cuss.
In short in information ruinous of governmental master plans
I am the very model of an angry little Texan man.

I know much more than those eggheads who actually stay in school.
They know official history and repeat it out all day like fools.
I quote in plain English all the crimes against humanity
By cronies in succession from A.Weishaupt to Sean Hannity.
I tell you, the illuminati sought to abolish family
And other cherished values like Christianity and property.
And of course that is what the neo-cons truly want too.
You say I’m talking nonsense? Oh no! That means they’ve got to you!


I once snuck right into the Grove and saw a child sacrifice!
O.K it was a dummy but still showed THEM as men of vice.
In short in information ruinous of governmental master plans
I am the very model of an angry little Texan man.

Yes, all the fighting in the world, it’s plain, that THEY control it all.
From Waco Tex to nine-eleven, each act of violence great and small.
If you’re sick blame fluoride, vaccines and chemtrails
The New World Order will not rest until our health completely fails.
They make our children violent, promiscuous and immoral
Since this will render all of them all the more controllable.
In short this is a smattering of New World Order Strategy.
It is in your best interest to take it very seriously.


But if you find my information somewhat counter-factual
It only proves your brainwashing has been quite effectual.
In short in information ruinous of governmental master plans
I am the very model of an angry little Texan man.



Any spelling errors were part of the original lyrics. Since the original version had them, I kept them in.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.2
How Funny: 4.2
Overall Rating: 4.2

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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 3   1
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 4   1
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 5   2
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