Making fun of music, one song at a time. Since the year 2000.
Check out the two amIright misheard lyrics books including one book devoted to misheard lyrics of the 1980s.
(Toggle Right Side Navigation)

Song Parodies -> "New Weapons are Too Cool"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"New Weapons are Too Cool"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Some of the latest weapons fielded by the US and Euro Armies are off the charts techwise. The Rod Satellite System works in pairs for com work and targeting. It drops a 20' long x 1' wide titanium rod at hypersonic velocity to destroy everything above ground and below. The centrifugal Dread Gun fires a constant stream of metal balls at 12,000 rpm @ 8000 fps! MAHEM is a jet of molten metal that once hurled at a tank forms an aerodynamic slug! Taser Shockwave is a belt of 36 tasers for non-lethal crowd control out to 35'. Quantum Stealth is lightweight cloaking device that bends light around wearers or vehicles. No support equipment or power needed. Defeats IR, thermal body heat, and visual. The Thunder Generator uses liquified petroleum, cooking gas, and air to cause massive directed explosions! And lastly the Germans have developed the laser freeze ray capable of lowering the temp 119C in one second! Designed to freeze enemy armor, aircraft, drones, obstacles, and personnel!!! Sorta makes the Metalstorm Gun, THEL, airborne laser, and normal stealth look weak!!!
New weapons are too cool
Sci-fi time

Rod Sats pairs of twos
Titan rod droppin'
Meteor hot and no way of stoppin'

Centrifugal Dread Gun bad
12,000 rpm proud
8000 fps
Metal balls take ANYTHING down
(No recoil, no flash, not even sound!)

New weapons are too cool
Sci-fi time
Crossed that line

MAHEM slag
Shockwave tag
Quantum stealth brag
Tech is unprecedented
For the next war
By various armies
More than lab-tested!

German laser freeze ray!
New weapons are too cool
Crossed the line
(Thunder Generator? No friggin' way!)

Yes, way!!!

Your Vote & Comment Counts

The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to leave a comment below about this parody.

Place Your Vote

 LittleLots
Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
How Funny: 
Overall Score: 



In order for your vote to count, you need to hit the 'Place Your Vote' button.
 

Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 14

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   0
 0
 0
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   14
 14
 14
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Rob Arndt - December 22, 2015 - Report this comment
No comment, Patrick???

The author of the parody has authorized comments, and wants YOUR feedback.

Link To This Page

The address of this page is: http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/screaminjayhawkins1256.shtml For help, see the examples of how to link to this page.

This is view # 635