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Song Parodies -> "US Carrier New (Improved)"

Original Song Title:

"I Put a Spell on You"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Screamin' Jay Hawkins

Parody Song Title:

"US Carrier New (Improved)"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

My 700th SJH IPASOY parody! The new US Supercarriers have arrived with the Gerald R. Ford Class replacing the older Nimitz Class carriers. Upgraded in every way possible, they should be in service from 2016-2050+!!!
US carrier new (improved)
Suits Navy fine

Eliminates 1000 crew
With automation
New installations

$11 Billion per unit
102,000 tons
Over 1100 feet long
At over 30 knots can move along!
(F-35 and X-47 strong)

US carrier new (improved)
And just in time
To challenge sea crimes

Reactors new- 2
Flight deck 1092 (ft)
Laser Mount cool
With Sea Sparrows and the RAMs
EM launch for air
Aircraft: 90
All paid by Uncle Sam

Supercarrier best
US carrier new (improved)
F' Chinese slime
(Let them put us to the test)
Some features: Automation, robotic fire control, new 300Mw reactors, EMALS, Free Electron Laser, reduced crew, larger flight deck, UCAV capabilities, F-35C ready, 1106' long, 256' beam, 125' waterline, 39' draft, 25 decks, 2x Sea Sparrow launchers, 2x RAM launchers, 4 Phalanx guns, 8x .50 cals, dual band radar, and ability to launch submersibles and recovery vehicles.

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - October 31, 2015 - Report this comment
Note: CVN-78 is USS Gerald R Ford, CVN-79 will be USS John F. Kennedy, and CVN-80 will again be USS Enterprise!!!

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