-> "The Limericks of Canada Day"
Original Song Title:
"The Limerick Song (traditional)"
Parody Song Title:
"The Limericks of Canada Day"
Parody Written by:
Giorgio Coniglio's Grandson (ed.); various authors
The Lyrics
[1a]: A British Columbian said,
“Where’s the place that I lay down my head?
No, it’s not Bogotá,
And not Leamington Spa,
But it’s fine old Vancouver instead!”
[1b]: It’s where Canada’s cattlemen toil
And miners check tar sands for oil;
It’s where prairies of wheat
And the tall Rockies meet.
All are found on Alberta’s rich soil.
[2]: Just ask farmers out in Saskatchewan
- The square province out west there?
Yes, that’s the one. -
Want a duck or a goose
Or a deer or a moose?
They’ll just jump in their pickup and catch you one.
[2]: The winters in old Manitoba
Are atrocious if faced stone-cold sober
That’s why in Winnipeg
They drink beer by the keg,
Commencing in early October.
[2]: There’s no place that’s less adversarial
Than that gracious host-province,
Ontario.
Christian, Muslim or Jew,
They don’t care what you do -
You’re respected from birth until burial.
[3]: There was a small boy of Quebec
Who was buried in snow to his neck;
When asked, “Are you friz?”
He replied, “Yes, I is;
But we don’t call this cold in Quebec.”
[2]: You can’t help but feel the emotion
And the bond people have with the ocean
Have a swim, catch a fish,
Visit Aunt Igonish.
There’s so much to do in Nova Scotia.
Ritardando:
[2]: “Excuse me, kind sir, is this NEW-foundland ?”
“That depends; it’s a question of WHO-foundland.”
“True, if I found land, few
Would consider it new,
But, a lost sheep, would she find it EWE-foundland ?”
[2]: While it’s not on your regular cruiser-route
For me, there is no place like Nunavut
Eat some seal in Iqaluit
Yessir, raw’s how you swallow it
It’s delicious; ask any stray Malamute.
[2]: Not one blade of grass, not a tree
For as far as your squint-eyes can see
You’ll see pack-ice and snow,
Wherever you go.
Just to summarize N.W.T.
[4]: You can’t find any rhymes for a lum’rick
To remind of the charms of New Brunswick.
As for the Yu-kon -
Let’s not dwell thereupon,
And forget about Prince Edward Island.
[4]: The French accent used by Québecois, (-cwa)
Doesn’t equal la langue spoke by moi (mwa) -
In ‘joual’ what they say
Sounds much more like ‘mo-ay’ -
So stay quiet or say, “Mo-é, j’parle pas.”
[1c]: There once was a saucy young wench
Who spoke in Canadian French.
From Moncton to Québec,
She left men in a wreck,
Giving hearts (and more parts) quite a wrench.
[1d]: Uncle Maxwell is going to die
And a lifetime of drinking is why.
An unreachable goal
From his youth took its toll.
Ads had told him, “Drink Canada Dry.”
[1e]: Three colonies *, each on its own,
Came together to form a new zone.
Thus, in CONFEDERATION
Was born a new nation.
Now look at how Canada’s grown !
[4]: There once was a man, a Canuck,
Who treasured his mask, stick and puck,
‘Til his daughter’s vile crime -
- Stole Dad’s team’s practice-time -
In the ruckus, Dad’s puck, it got took.
[1] Poems from OEDILF, the limerick-dictionary project; a "neilski"; b "sigg"; c "Aliza" d Chris J. Strolin, editor; e Roger Vick.
[2] Poems by Adrian deKuyper, modified.
[3] Poem by Rudyard Kipling.
[4] Lyrics by Giorgio Coniglio
Your Vote & Comment Counts
The parody authors spend a lot of time writing parodies for the website and they
appreciate feedback in the form of votes and comments. Please take some time to
leave a comment below about this parody.
|
|
Voting Results
|
Pacing: | 3.5 | |
How Funny: | 3.5 | |
Overall Rating: | 3.5 | |
|
Total Votes: | 26 |
|
Voting Breakdown
The following represent how many people voted for each category.
| | | | Pacing | | | How Funny | | | Overall Rating | |
| 1 | | 9 | |
| 9 | |
| 9 | |
|
| 2 | | 0 | |
| 0 | |
| 0 | |
|
| 3 | | 1 | |
| 1 | |
| 1 | |
|
| 4 | | 1 | |
| 1 | |
| 1 | |
|
| 5 | | 15 | |
| 15 | |
| 15 | |
|