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Song Parodies -> "Ye Liberals by Name"

Original Song Title:

"Ye Jacobites by Name"

Original Performer:

Robert Burns

Parody Song Title:

"Ye Liberals by Name"

Parody Written by:

GarrettM.

The Lyrics

Ye Liberals by name, lend an ear, lend an ear!
Ye Liberals by name, lend an ear!
Ye Liberals by name, you faults I shall proclaim!
Your lies and doctrine shame!
You shall hear! You shall hear!
Your lies and doctrine shame, you shall hear!

What are the rights of man? What's his worth? What's his worth?
What are the rights of man? What's his worth?
If he can't say a word, by threat of force or sword,
His name and actions slurred,
What's his worth? What's his worth?
His name and actions slurred – what's his worth?

Which is the better race? Dark or fair? Dark or fair?
Which is the better race? Dark or fair?
Which is the better race, when neither shall embrace?
But both will know their place!
This they'll know! This they'll know!
And both will know their place – this they'll know!

Who pays the most in tax? Rich or poor? Rich or poor?
Who pays the most in tax, rich or poor?
Whether rich or whether poor, they're always craving more!
They'll bleed us to the core!
Rich and poor! Rich and poor!
They'll bleed us to the core – rich and poor!

Ye Liberals by name, lend an ear, lend an ear!
Ye Liberals by name, lend an ear!
Ye Liberals by name, you faults I shall proclaim!
Your lies and doctrine shame!
You shall hear! You shall hear!
Your lies and doctrine shame, you shall hear!

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.7
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 35

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2
 2
 
 2   1
 0
 0
 
 3   1
 1
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 4   1
 2
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 5   30
 30
 30
 

User Comments

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Michael Pacholek - May 13, 2016 - Report this comment
Garbage. Utter garbage. Liberals built this country, and every time conservatives come along, liberals have to rebuild it. Conservatism doesn't work. It is morally bankrupt.
Quote - May 13, 2016 - Report this comment
The United States of America have exhibited, perhaps, the first example of governments erected on the simple principles of nature; and if men are now sufficiently enlightened to disabuse themselves of artifice, imposture, hypocrisy, and superstition, they will consider this event as an era in their history. Although the detail of the formation of the American governments is at present little known or regarded either in Europe or in America, it may hereafter become an object of curiosity. It will never be pretended that any persons employed in that service had interviews with the gods, or were in any degree under the influence of Heaven, more than those at work upon ships or houses, or laboring in merchandise or agriculture; it will forever be acknowledged that these governments were contrived merely by the use of reason and the senses.” ~John Adams, “A Defence of the Constitutions of Government of the United States of America” 1787-1788.
Sukmi Dicholek - May 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Genius. Utter genius. Conservatives built this country, and every time leftists come along, conservatives have to rebuild it. Leftism doesn't work. It is morally bankrupt.
Dr Giorgio Coniglio dec - May 14, 2016 - Report this comment
Even if we accord a tie between Michael and his badly-named detractor (who uses echoing words), we would have to give a winning vote to Robbie Burns and his Whiggish views. In 18th century Britain, a large majority opposed a restoration of the divine right of kings and of Catholic royalty, If the Jacobite doctrine had succeeded in the short term, it would have taken major effort to put Britain back on the road that led to parliamentary democracy.
Sukthis - May 14, 2016 - Report this comment
@M.P.'s evil twin: Remember the corruption and incompetence of the business model of government inflicted upon us by Harding, Coolidge and Hoover? It took FDR and his liberal pals to get us through the Great Depression with Keynesian economics and a government big enough to administer his alphabet soup of reforms, which included the Social Security pension you're probably living on. "A traitor to his class," the oligarchs complained. Then FDR had to fight off his right-wing isolationist enemies, like the odious Lindbergh and Joseph Kennedy, to join the battle against the mortal threat of Nazism. Conservatives didn't show their feces for more than 30 years, and now we have their reincarnation of Mussolini. As Churchill once observed, "Time marches on. Tock-tick."
Suck it to ME? - May 14, 2016 - Report this comment
FDR saved capitalism. You should be grateful.
Chocolate Salty Balls - May 14, 2016 - Report this comment
http://newsroom.ucla.edu/releases/FDR-s-Policies-Prolonged-Depression-5409

FDR's policies prolonged Depression by 7 years, UCLA economists calculate

Two UCLA economists say they have figured out why the Great Depression dragged on for almost 15 years, and they blame a suspect previously thought to be beyond reproach: President Franklin D. Roosevelt.

After scrutinizing Roosevelt's record for four years, Harold L. Cole and Lee E. Ohanian conclude in a new study that New Deal policies signed into law 71 years ago thwarted economic recovery for seven long years.

"Why the Great Depression lasted so long has always been a great mystery, and because we never really knew the reason, we have always worried whether we would have another 10- to 15-year economic slump," said Ohanian, vice chair of UCLA's Department of Economics. "We found that a relapse isn't likely unless lawmakers gum up a recovery with ill-conceived stimulus policies."

In an article in the August issue of the Journal of Political Economy, Ohanian and Cole blame specific anti-competition and pro-labor measures that Roosevelt promoted and signed into law June 16, 1933.

"President Roosevelt believed that excessive competition was responsible for the Depression by reducing prices and wages, and by extension reducing employment and demand for goods and services," said Cole, also a UCLA professor of economics. "So he came up with a recovery package that would be unimaginable today, allowing businesses in every industry to collude without the threat of antitrust prosecution and workers to demand salaries about 25 percent above where they ought to have been, given market forces. The economy was poised for a beautiful recovery, but that recovery was stalled by these misguided policies."
Confusing facts about the National SOCIALISTS - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Nazis: Left-wing, not Right.

http://www.patriot-fire.org/leftwingnazis.html

When one researches the past and present philosophy of the National Socialist Party (Nazi), almost all of the rhetoric resembles left-wing ideology.

From the NAZI Platform itself:

“In order to make higher education—and thereby entry into leading positions—available to every able and industrious German, the State must provide a thorough restructuring of our entire public educational system. The courses of study at all educational institutions are to be adjusted to meet the requirements of practical life. Understanding of the concept of the State must be achieved through the schools (teaching of civics) at the earliest age at which it can be grasped. We demand the education at the public expense of specially gifted children of poor parents, without regard to the latter’s position or occupation."

"The State must raise the level of national health by means of mother-and-child care, the banning of juvenile labor, achievement of physical fitness through legislation for compulsory gymnastics and sports, and maximum support for all organizations providing physical training for young people ”

State controlled education? National healthcare? This isn’t right-wing ideology. However, this is not sufficient to prove my case.

Here are more points from the NAZI Platform:

“We demand the nationalization of all enterprises (already) converted into corporations (trusts).
We demand profit-sharing in large enterprises.
We demand the large-scale development of old-age pension schemes.
We demand the creation and maintenance of a sound middle class; the immediate communalization of the large department stores, which are to be leased at low rates to small tradesmen.
We demand the most careful consideration for the owners of small businesses in orders placed by national, state, or community authorities.
We demand land reform in accordance with our national needs and a law for expropriation without compensation of land for public purposes. Abolition of ground rent and prevention of all speculation in land.”

Profit-sharing (aka “spreading the wealth”)? Nationalization of enterprises? Communalization? Rent/price control? Taking land for “public purposes”?

How is any of this right-wing?

It’s not. In fact, much of this stems directly from the philosophy that Karl Marx created called Marxism (which all forms of communism & socialism stem from, including Nazism and even Mussolini's Fascism).

Franklin D. Roosevelt and Woodrow Wilson (both “progressives”) demanded much of the same when they were presidents, yet, no one disputes that they were left-wing. Yet teachers and media today state Hitler was right-wing?

One might ask, “Well why do people continue to say NAZI’s are right-wing when everything about them is left-wing?” Stalin said it best, “A lie repeated a thousand times becomes truth.” He seems to be correct.
Sukthis - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
I, too, can Google, copy, and paste to my advantage: The contention that FDR prolonged or made the Depression worse rests on ignoring everything that happened between 1933 and 1936, and focusing instead on what happened when FDR was persuaded by fiscally libertarianish advisors to scale back deficit spending, and with it, the New Deal programs that were making the recovery happen:
A second cyclical downturn officially began in May 1937 when FDR, always a fiscal conservative, mistakenly thought the economy had become self-sustaining and slashed public spending programs to balance the budget. These harsh and premature spending cuts caused another severe recession that ended after 13 months in June 1938.
When the economy contracted sharply in late 1937 and early 1938, FDR quickly reversed course and rapid growth immediately began again. GDP soared by 10.9 percent in 1939 and industrial production soared by 23 percent.

So you see, friends, when the recovery faltered it was because temporarily there was not enough deficit spending to create jobs (notably on infrastructure), not enough safety net programs, and not enough government regulation. In short, not enough New Deal!
Sukthis "Logic" - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Places that obviously haven't had enough New Deal yet:

North Korea
Greece
Zimbabwe
Brazil
Venezuela
California
Chicago, IL
Detroit, MI
Camden, NJ
Flint, MI
Washington D.C.
Robert Heinlein - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Throughout history, poverty is the normal condition of man. Advances which permit this norm to be exceeded—here and there, now and then—are the work of an extremely small minority, frequently despised, often condemned, and almost always opposed by all right-thinking people. Whenever this tiny minority is kept from creating, or (as sometimes happens) is driven out of a society, the people then slip back into abject poverty.

This is known as “bad luck.”
Rob Arndt - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
To the idiot who knows nothing of Nazism. You conveniently left out that the Reich was based on continual war. Children were raised as future soldiers, couples were rewarded for producing future soldiers, businesses flourished producing weapons of war with no intention of peace. Germany existed to wage war forever. Peace is only the suspension of war to rearm. And of course there's Nazi ideology based on the occult, xenophobia, Prussian militarism, and scapegoats. A master race with a master plan to kill all undesirables, to eliminate freedom of speech and a free media. None of that is liberalism. It's far extreme right national socialism. Everything for Germany at all cost. And that included slave labor, raping all conquered lands of food, technology, scientists, and rounding up Jews, Roma, the disabled and mentally ill to be exterminated. And they did it without conscience under the evil Hakenkreuz which is NOT a swastika nor based on the 5000 year old good luck charm. It was off the Black Sun wheel of Sig Rune spokes since 1919 from Thule and Vril. You know nothing of Nazi Germany.
Russian Joke - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
In Soviet Union, future is always known. Past is what keeps changing.
Rob Arndt's "Reasoning" - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Obviously, the "progressive" far left in America has NEVER waged wars just to wage wars (except, you know, in Serbia and Libya and Qatar and Vietnam...), NEVER dabbled in occult New Age twaddle (except for Wicca and Satanism and stuff), NEVER been xenophobic toward Asians and German homeschoolers and Syrian Christians, NEVER instituted public schools according to the Prussian militaristic model, NEVER murdered tens of millions of the inconvenient unborn (especially blacks), NEVER eliminated freedom of speech and the press (except on college campuses and any other "safe space"), NEVER enslaved people (except Christians who won't make cakes to celebrate the perversions the gaystapo goose-steppers, and doctors, and hospitals...), NEVER raped conquered lands of food, technology, and scientists (not counting Operation Paperclip, the Oklahoma reservations, and all the food burnt to keep prices artificially propped up during the New Deal), NEVER rounded up despised minorities and disabled and mentally ill people for extermination (though "anti-Zionism" and some "progressive" experiments in eugenic sterilization and the internment of Japanese Americans in concentration camps was fine with them), and NEVER had ANYTHING AT ALL IN COMMON with the Nazis' ideology... at least, not once their former hero Hitler turned against their other hero, his ally Stalin. No, there was NOTHING left-wing at all about the Nazis except for, you know, all that stuff.
Sukthis - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
There is no equivalence between the progressive far left in America and Nazism. The latter was a military-industrial dictatorship, steeped in war and conquest, awash with dreams of racial purity and superiority, infatuated by banners and uniforms and mass conformity, hungry for expansion, and seething with indignation since 1918. Primacy of the military, its leadership, and its industrial backbone is a right-wing phenomenon. North Korea has these characteristics, but it is neither left nor right; it's an anomaly.
Sukthis - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
This is really getting off topic, but Rob, how close were the Nazis to getting the A-bomb? There is a widely-cited incident, which may be partly embellished, that the O.S.S. sent an ex-Major League baseball player, the multi-lingual, Princeton-educated Moe Berg to Germany to hear a lecture by Werner Heisenberg and determine whether they were on track. Was Donovan & Co. so amateurish as to send an otherwise unemployable Jewish backup catcher to wartime Germany in order to pass judgment on the subject of nuclear fission?
Sukthis - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Berg allegedly reported back that Heisenberg did not indicate that German scientists were close to solving the intricacies of the Bomb.
Rob Arndt - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Germany had multiple WMDs in WW2 and it's atomic programs, plural, are falsified. Try under FOIA to get accurate information. The whole impure graphite as moderator and heavy water chain reaction failure is a half-truth at best. Germany already had developed nerve gases Sarin, Somen, and Tabun, but no orders came to use them even though Tabun was in Berlin on a barge on a river with gas-filled artillery shells. The Luftwaffe had the first FAEs (Fuel-Air Explosives) by late 1944 but no bombers to deliver them and no crews willing to work with the bombs (same thing happened in 1940 with the German Army and new Greek Fire N-material which the SS moved production over to Falkenhagen). Furthermore, two radiologicals were found at Ohrdruf and were destroyed. German plans for radiological D-1 and D-2 were discovered with 5 D-2 missiles found destroyed at Leese with radiological cargo bays. And then there is the SS Firedamp weapon also known as the liquid air bomb which combined a 60/40 mix of coal dust and LOX with a reagent. Damage? 4.5 km radius with unusual lightning at ground level effect. As for atomics, the SS started a second military program after Hitler was injured in the July 1944 bomb plot Operation Valkyrie. The SS was put in charge of all of Germany's super weapons under SS General Hans Kammler. Immediately, cyclotrons, gaseous diffusion and EM urianium separation units were produced to process huge stocks of German uranium. The program divided the program into two goals: a Reisen or Giant Bomb and a small Klein tactical nuke of 440 kg to be carried by fighter SO BF 109 (Suicide). There were unexplained tests of this mini-nuke or the liquid oxygen bomb in January 1945 in the Baltic and March 1945 in Thuringia. A 92 foot new rocket was tested in Thuringia as well. The US Govt will not acknowledge these tests as atomic, nor even confirm the SS second program. They lie about history just as they had done with the Foo Fighter controversy of Nov 1944 thru April 1945 in Germany and then Summer of 1945 in Japan. In the declassified document German Capabilities for 1945 both the "Phoo Bombs" and EM Wave weapon are listed as German weapons. The Phoos were unmanned, remote-controlled air vehicles with electrostatic weapons designed to knock out enemy aircraft engines and warning radars. Speed? 526 mph! Designations are: AEG Kugelwaffen, WNF Feuerball, and Kugelblitz. The British called them Kraut Meteors. The EM Wave weapon was deployed at Jonastal S.III installation and fended off more than 50 attempts to bomb it while under construction. Range was 7 miles out up to 30,000 ft! No bombers or recon plane ever succeeded. And the Germans had flugscheiben or flight disc technology classified until 2020.It took 50 years for the USAF to admit the Germans even had them through persistent FOIA requests by Jim Wilson of Popular Mechanics. It's been 21 years since and no designations, flight performance figures, photos, or histories have been given. Same for the Bell Device or Die Glocke which held the highest Reich priority. The US also denied that, but has now admitted it as a claimed X-ray centrifuge when in fact it was located in a mine by itself and required an entire power station to run it for minutes at a time. During this time, it was tethered because it levitated!!! That's either a propulsion unit or what the Germans claim it was- a Zeitmaschine or Time Machine. The Sanskrit markings at the bottom along with other occult markings suggest it might have been an attempt to build a modern Mercury powered Vimana! So again, idiot, don't test me on Nazi Germany. I'm known as a specialist on their tech.
Sukthis Smirnnoff - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
In Russia, you dont go looking for party. Party goes looking for YOU!
Ken - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
Sukthis is a troll, so please stop feeding him. The parody was good. Period. 5s
Robert Burns - May 15, 2016 - Report this comment
"There is no such uncertainty as a sure thing."

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