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Song Parodies -> "You're An Oldie"

Original Song Title:

"You Don't Know Me"

Original Performer:

Ray Charles

Parody Song Title:

"You're An Oldie"

Parody Written by:

PMS with help from Charlie

The Lyrics

My friend Charlie contributed the verse about hair. This started out as a 50th birthday song but soon grew beyond that. Sort of a chronicle of the aging process from the first little warning signs to the more advanced stages. It's longer than the OS. Forgive me.
We seek eternal youth
But finally at some stage
We learn the ugly truth;
The ravages of age
Will take their toll on you,
No matter what you do.
When you're an oldie.
(You're an oldie, you're an oldie)

You're saying things that you
Once swore you'd never say.
"I was your age once too",
"By Cracky, in the day..."
It hits you like a bomb,
You sound just like your Mom.
You're now an oldie.

For you never knew how fast old age creeps up.
Thought it couldn't happen to you.
But to your dismay
'Bout nearly every day
You see a stark reminder or two.

You can recall events
That happened long ago.
But how today was spent
You surely do not know.
Your short term memory
Is nearly shot, you see.
Cuz you're an oldie.
(You're an oldie, you're an oldie)

You make a routine trip,
You're cruising in your car.
And have a mental slip;
Can't 'member where you are.
Or where you're headed to.
What's happening to you?
You're now an oldie.

For you never knew how fast old age creeps up.
Thought it couldn't happen to you.
But to your dismay
'Bout nearly every day
You see a stark reminder or two.

You're a bit shorter now
Than you were yesteryear
Hair on your head somehow
Migrated to your ears
Kids play connect the dots
With all your liver spots.
When you're an oldie.
(You're an oldie, you're an oldie)

Those sphincters once so tight
Eventually get weak
Get up three times a night
Having to take a leak.
And often when you sneeze
You tend to cut the cheese.
Cuz you're an oldie.
(You're an oldie, you're an oldie)

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
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 2   0
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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   6
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User Comments

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alvin rhodes - September 12, 2005 - Report this comment
i can relate...especially like the liver spots line...5s
Michael Pacholek - September 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Why, back in my day, this would've been considered funny. It still is. That's the way it is, and we like it!
Arwen - September 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Well I think this is just FABulous. I, of course, eternally young, cannot relate...but it's still very very funny...especially since Mr. Pacholek told me what it's like getting old. =)

Also, when it's good writing, lengthening the song is always okay...=) GREAT JOB.
PMS - September 12, 2005 - Report this comment
Thanks Alvin, Michael and Arwen.
Adagio - September 13, 2005 - Report this comment
Good parody. Flows nice and easy with zingers thrown in. 5's
Michael Pacholek - September 13, 2005 - Report this comment
It's a drag, Arwen. Things just ain't the same today, I hear bad mothers say... (Shut your mouth!)

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