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Song Parodies -> "I Am The Very Model Of A Fan Of Oldie Poppy Rock"

Original Song Title:

"I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General"

Original Performer:

Gilbert & Sullivan

Parody Song Title:

"I Am The Very Model Of A Fan Of Oldie Poppy Rock"

Parody Written by:

Andy Primus

The Lyrics

This parody is done to match the Delacorte Theater version with George Rose as the MG (from YouTube)
(There are other versions – this is the one where he is wearing a white uniform with a red sash)

All words or phrases marked with * have a meaning listed in the table below the parody.
A lot of UK slang will mean something completely different to someone from the US.
Some words have been added because they can have other, more obvious, meanings as well.
There are a few pacing anomalies in the song that are also explained below the parody.


I am the very model of a fan of oldie poppy rock
I hate, with passion, all the rappers: load o’ bull and poppycock
We had the best, in England, and I quote the Stones’ back catalogue
With “Paint It, Black” an’ “Jumpin’ Jack”, no wonder I’m still that agog

They’re very swell; I rate The Who; their singles were sensational
His writin’, grand: P Townshend; for him, music: occupational
No doubt the young ‘uns’ll jeer ‘em; they’re screaming for them *grotty crews
(Spoken line)
Ooh, Diddy crews, Fiddy crews…hate ‘em!
(Resume singing)
So many fearful males; a din they blare; she’s fake: their *dotty *muse

(So many leer-full tales of how, once bare, they make the *totty ooze)
(So many near-full tails; a bitch’ll swear, but take the *botty bruise)
(So many near-full jails; they best beware an’ brake their dotty, *potty views)

I finish work at “5:15”; “My Generation”: pub, we root
I try to *shag terrific dames; no uglies will I “Substitute”
For sport, of girlies, I’m “The Seeker”; when I *pull, I’m “Happy Jack”
They often run a mile when they hear I’m full o’ crappy yack

(For short an’ curlies: like ‘em sleeker; wire wool: not “Happy Jack”)
(When soft an’ fun: a smile; like ‘em sheer, not full: a snappy crack)

-----

I know our Clapton’s history; The Yardbirds: where he started off
But after “For Your Love” hit: feelin’ quitty, paced, then darted off
I note that his *replacement did some tracks with audio zing in ‘em
The Breakers I once saw, long after Eric did his thing in ‘em

I…know well, the Cream had riffy skills: “Cat’s Squirrel”, “Badge” and “Ulysses”
But now that Baker’s ancient, if he gives it all, he’ll duly wheeze
The guy could drum: a “Toad”, in which we heard ol’ Ginger bangin’ ‘em
(Spoken line)
Ooh, bangin’ ‘em, clangin’ ‘em…love it!
(Resume singing)
When vocal: much ignore; we ran for cover when he sang in ‘em

(When vocal: such a bore; I bet his mother would be dangin’ ‘em)
(When vocal: such a chore; ears will recover, but it stang in ‘em)
(When vocal: such a snore; ears: not a lover, for the *tang, it stang in ‘em)

Then Eric made a supergroup; The Dirty Mac was groovy stuff
The gig was only temp’ry; played the *Circus, but the movie: duff
The band had Lennon, Mitch an’ Richards; coulda been so really big
It was the very model of a super group I really dig

(I’m glad the Lennon *witch was silent; woulda been one crappy gig)
(Instead, the very model of a super-duper happy gig)

-----

Then Blind, was Eric, in the Faith; not long before: *“God” doo-dl-in’
“Do What You Like” was shite; a lousy earful; dire noo-dl-in’
Then E.C. met his next band; they’re the Bramlett’s, though not with ‘em yet
“Not funny”, said Delaney: Eric *nicked his backin’ rhythm set

Well, I then learned that Derek and The Dominos were ruddy good
An’ I could tell, that white kids play the blues as well as Muddy could
A shock when he did heroin, with Jim M. dead so recently
(Spoken line)
Ooh, I say, that’s a bad one *innit: *smack, an’ that crack, ha, ha, ha, ha…stupid!
(Resume singing)
With Lymon, Joplin, Wilson: dead, ‘em all, an’ so indecently

(Then Whitten, Taylor, Buckley: dead, ‘em all, an’ so indecently)
(Then Bolin, Kossoff, Culloch: dead, ‘em all, an’ so indecently)
(Then Hardin, Slovak, Davis: dead, ‘em all, an’ Staley much more recently)

Hope my parody was solid; if it’s sucky, bet you’re long asleep
I could’ve been the clown an’ done a TT, i.e. song o’ sheep
Or write a story ‘bout Obama; Democrats: I’d grill ‘em all
Or one with lots of booze in, an’ a pal; of how we’d swill ‘em all

(Or write a story ‘bout Osama; ruddy rats: I’d kill ‘em all)
(Or one with lots of ewes in, an’ a gal; of how I’d drill ‘em all)


A few points on pacing anomalies – don’t know if all versions are the same:
(a-BOUT bi-NO-mi-al THEO-rem) = (No doubt the young ‘uns’ll jeer ‘em)
(all the CRIMES of HE-li-o-GAB-a-lus) = (done some tracks with audio zing in ‘em)
(I…can TELL un-DOUBT-ed RAPH-a-ELS) = (I know well, the Cream had riffy skills)
(for my MIL-i-TAR-y KNOW-ledge) = (Hope my parody was solid)
There are 2 extra syllables (in the last lines only) in each section of triple repeated lines (in brackets)

Grotty = unpleasant, of poor quality
Dotty = eccentric
Muse = a force, personified as a woman, which is the source of inspiration for a creative artist
Totty = sexually desirable females
Botty = bottom
Potty = crazy
Shag = to boff, hump, etc
Pull = win the affections of (a possible partner)
His replacement = Jeff Beck
Tang = an unpleasant tone
Circus = The Rolling Stones’ Rock And Roll Circus (unreleased 1968 film)
The Lennon witch = Yoko
God, doodling = “Clapton is God” graffito (on a London Underground train station in 1967)
Nicked = stole
Innit = isn’t it
Smack = heroin

Tracks mentioned:
1966 The Rolling Stones – Paint It, Black
1968 The Rolling Stones – Jumpin’ Jack Flash
1973 The Who – 5:15
1965 The Who – My Generation
1966 The Who – Substitute
1970 The Who – The Seeker
1966 The Who – Happy Jack
1965 The Yardbirds – For Your Love
1966 Cream – Cat’s Squirrel
1968 Cream – Badge
1967 Cream – Tales of Brave Ulysses
1966 Cream – Toad
1969 Blind Faith – Do What You Like

Eric Clapton:
1963 - 1965 The Yardbirds
(Keith Relf, Eric Clapton, Chris Dreja, Paul Samwell-Smith & Jim McCarty)
1965 - 1966 The Bluesbreakers
(John Mayall, Eric Clapton, John McVie & Hughie Flint)
1966 The Powerhouse
(Steve Winwood, Paul Jones, Eric Clapton, Ben Palmer, Jack Bruce & Pete York)
1966 - 1968 Cream
(Jack Bruce, Eric Clapton & Ginger Baker)
1968 The Dirty Mac
(John Lennon, Eric Clapton, Keith Richards & Mitch Mitchell)
1969 Blind Faith
(Steve Winwood, Eric Clapton, Ric Grech & Ginger Baker)
1969 - 1970 Bonnie & Delaney
(Bonnie Bramlett, Delaney Bramlett, Eric Clapton, Bobby Whitlock, Carl Radle, Jim Gordon & others)
1970 - 1971 Derek and The Dominos
(Eric Clapton, Bobby Whitlock, Carl Radle & Jim Gordon – with guest, Duane Allman)

Dead singers and musicians (heroin):
1968 Frankie Lymon (The Teenagers)
1970 Janis Joplin (Big Brother and the Holding Company)
1970 Alan Wilson (Canned Heat)
1971 Jim Morrison (The Doors)
1972 Danny Whitten (Crazy Horse)
1974 Vinnie Taylor (Sha Na Na)
1975 Tim Buckley (solo artist)
1976 Tommy Bolin (Deep Purple)
1976 Paul Kossoff (Free)
1979 Jimmy McCulloch (Wings)
1980 Tim Hardin (solo artist)
1988 Hillel Slovak (Red Hot Chili Peppers)
1988 Jesse Ed Davis (session artist)
2002 Layne Staley (Alice in Chains)

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Original Song: 
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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 8

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 0
 0
 
 2   1
 1
 1
 
 3   0
 0
 0
 
 4   0
 0
 0
 
 5   7
 7
 7
 

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Patrick - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
I remember "Happy Jack". It was used in a TV commercial a couple years ago for the General Motors "Hummer" utility vehicle. Not sure why. Isn't it a song about children making fun of a mentally retarded man?
Bruno - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Spooky. It's like you've seen my record collection. I remember Kossoff's dad David ( a rabbi I think) reading stories on a Sunday programme in the '60's. The UK slang made it easier for me to connect. Top marks for a lot of hard work.
Andy Primus - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks Patrick - Yes, I think it's about a man who would sleep on the beach where Pete Townshend used to holiday as a child. It does seem an odd choice for a car ad.

Thanks Bruno - I've always liked 60's pop/rock (& 70's Purple/Sabbath/Zeppelin/Tull/Free etc).
Tommy Turtle - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Dotty, muse, smack, and shag work WOP also. "Pull" would have an entirely different meaning here, more like Osama in our parody today: it's something one does alone. So glad you explained that one! :)

I wish Below Average Dave would see this. We were just "discussing" how he sees no point in repeatedly doing Big 7 parodies that have been done many times. The sheer technical skill and mastery shown here, not to mention the nostalgia, history, and guffaws, are worth a dozen or more commonplace ones. In all fairness, BAD writes mostly for recording and production. so I see his point. But that doesn't change the fact that as a piece of *writing*, this is incredible.

:LOL at the (well-deserved) TT-sheep line, and *looking forward* to that parody grilling Obama and the Democrats. (I'll have mine very rare, please. The rarer, the better, as very few of them are well done.;-D) 555+++
@ Two-Bomber: Get A Life - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
Or show us something you've written that;s so much better than this.
AFW - May 16, 2011 - Report this comment
What TT said and more...and all the footnotes..Is this your first parody to this song?...You must've burned a lot of midnight oil, here...Monumental job
TT @ AFW - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
Andy is probably more knowledgeable about TOS than almost anyone else here, as you can see from his intro statement about knowing many versions of it. This is his *tenth* MG out of only 143 parodies, or, to put it TT-style, 7% of all his songs are M-G's.

@ Andy: AFW's comment did remind me that I meant to ask you: Are you trying a coup to dethrone TT as the Footnote King? Dost thou wish to joust with me, Sire? Or as we say here. "You wanna piece of me?"       (j/k, of course! -- love parodies that both entertain and inform.)
Wendy Christopher - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
I am in awe! Skilful, hilarious, sharp as a knife and pacing so tight it would stay waterproof - a well-deserved 555. And while I'm not quite old enough to actually remember a lot of the references, Im certainly old enough to nod sagely as if I do and be believed. :^) Top job, sir!
Andy Primus - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks TT - I'm surprised that "smack" is known in the US (I thought that one was purely UK only). I knew that you wouldn't get "pull", although it's a very common UK expression. If you're going out somewhere with the intention of finding a new partner, you're "out on the pull" & once you've spotted someone you like, a really corny chat-up line is to tell her to "go get your coat, you've pulled".

Thanks @ TTwo-Bomber - I can understand the 2's for "funny" & "overall", but the 2 for "pacing" just shows that they didn't even read it (or that they don't understand what pacing actually means).

Thanks AFW - the footnotes weren't needed (apart from the UK only slang) but were just added in case anyone is actually interested in Clapton's different bands & who the dead smack heads were.

Thanks TT (again) - To do 10 of these out of a 143 total does seem a bit excessive, but I enjoy the challenge. In the time I've spent on them I could have upped my total number of parodies by about 100 (as long as I used easy songs like "Yesterday" - which I've already done once but was bored of it before I'd even finished).
No, you can remain the flippernote king. Joust? I'm no honourable knight. I wouldn't waste my time play-jousting with you. A good sharp whack on the bonce with a mace used to work well if you wanted to take someone's position. I bet you don't know what a bonce is (another UK only) :)

Thanks Wendy - Wow, glad you thought it was that good. I did spend a lot of time on it. I'm not really old enough to remember it as it was happening either. I was still in nappies when Clapton cut his first demos!
TT - May 17, 2011 - Report this comment
I meant to imply that it was impressive, not excessive (heh!). Sorry it came out wrong. I've done 12 solo MGs and one with FG, and once facetiously "threatened" to do 300 of them, a la JAB's 300 "I Put A Spell On You".

http://www.amiright.com/parody/misc/gilbertsullivan117.shtml
although you've already v/c'd.

Irony, I DKTOS when I came here, and learned it from the site. Now, always love to do this song, or to see a *good* spin on it by anyone else.
          Re: could have done 100 Y'days -- quality beats quantity any day, though I plead guilty to 14 solo "Yesterdays" and two with FG. In my defense, some were educational (grammar and usage), and many were tributes to other writers, including one to ChuckyG himself. Its format lends itself well to such things, for some reason.

And as said, I was just kidding about the footnote thing. If anything, the more who use them, the fewer will rag on TT for using them. :-D .. and I'm not competing with anyone here except myself, on *anything*. Cheers!
Andy Primus @ TT - May 18, 2011 - Report this comment
It didn't come out wrong - i'd just never thought about it being 7% of my total output. I'd never heard the M-G before I began posting here either. I played it on YouTube to go with a JAB parody & liked it enough to want to keep going back to it.
Tommy Turtle - May 18, 2011 - Report this comment
It could be 100% of your output, so long as the quality stays at it always has.

Profound thought that I'd intended to post some day, but never did:
OS are usually chosen in one of three ways:

1) You hate an OS and want to skewer it, or you like it and enjoy its structure, meter, etc., so you do it, perhaps many times; or

2) You have something particular that you want to say, and you need to find "just the right OS" so that your parody can say it and fit; or

3) You see, think of, or hear (on radio, say) an OS title that just "begs" for a particular switch.

All are cool. I would probably never have done "Mama Told Me (Not To Come)" but the concept was OBL's porn stash, so in running potential titles through the mind, which means potential OS title switches, "'Sama's Lonely; Gotta Come" fit the bill perfectly. Hence, that OS. (Method 2)

I'm sure most of us use each method at various times. I don't particularly want to parody "Yesterday" per se, e. g., but it's a go-to for tributes and grammarodies.

An example of #3: I often hear songs on the satellite radio while driving, and a title switch occurs immediately. Quick example: "This Girl Is A Woman Now". Only two phoneme changes make that "This Girl Is A Human Cow", and although TT's done that topic many times, he couldn't wait to get home and write it. Cheers.

just realized that the last one mentioned was way before you're time here. *No Obligation*, but if you're interested,
http://www.amiright.com/parody/60s/garypucketttheuniongap6.shtml
Of course, no offense taken if not read. (it's TT's 9th-ranked song out of 431, by page views, still getting many views 3 1/2 years after posting. And "TT" itself becomes a monstrous pun under the circumstances there. )

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