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Song Parodies -> "Randolf the Two-gunned Cowboy"

Original Song Title:

"Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer"

Original Performer:

Gene Autry

Parody Song Title:

"Randolf the Two-gunned Cowboy"

Parody Written by:


The Lyrics

You heard of Wild Bill and Annie Oakley, And Jesse James. Buffalo Bill, and Davy Crocket and Calamity Jane?

Well, do you recall, the most fearsome gunslinger of all?

Randolf the two-gun cowboy
Had 2 big shiny guns
And if you ever saw him
You’d turn around and run

All of the other cowboys
Used to scream and run away
They’d never let poor Randolf
Play in any poker games.

Then one time, right ‘bout at noon
The Daltons came to town.

Randolf with your guns so bright
Won’t you kill those Daltons tonight.

Then how the townfolks loved him
‘Till he started his shootin’ spree
Oh, please, Oh please Mr. Randolf
Don’t go shootin’ me.

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.7
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 4.8

Total Votes: 6

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   0
 3   1
 4   0
 5   5

User Comments

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Old Man Ribber - March 05, 2010 - Report this comment
You got off "Scott - free" on this one! Nicely done, pardner. ;D
Patrick - March 05, 2010 - Report this comment
In the dark of the night at High Noon he gunned down 10 Dalton Boys and the horses they rode in on. Without reloading his six-shooter.
2Eagle - March 05, 2010 - Report this comment
Dumb dumb dead Irving was no match for Randolf.
Phil Nelson - March 05, 2010 - Report this comment
2Eagle stole my comment! I always think of the Irving song when I hear about Irving Texas. Anyway, stellar parody about a stellar gunslinger!
Old Man Ribber - March 06, 2010 - Report this comment
Eagle and Phil - blessings to you! I thought I was the only living person who knew Frank Gallup's Legend of Irving! ;D
Andria - March 06, 2010 - Report this comment
Excellent, and 5s. Great first parody, quozaxx. (I think that was your first, I've been here for most of this site's existence, for better or worse, and I haven't seen any other parodies under your name, so I'm going by that. :-) )
BR> OMR: I know that song too. It's one of my favorite non-parody novelty songs, often played on Dr. Demento.
randolph's daughter - February 17, 2014 - Report this comment
My father sung this exact song to me many times when i was a young girl and told me he wrote it! I'm 47 and it was way before the internet. Wether my father wrote this or not I can't say but it was definitely not written recently or by quoaxx...
Sergeant Major David Carden - April 29, 2014 - Report this comment
I am 67. US Army 1965-1995. In 1955 or '56 I was a participant in a school community Christmas play at Nickerson, Nebraska. A skit we performed, choreographed by our music teacher, was "Randolph the Two-Gun Cowboy". Tommy Strong was Randolph and some of us were poker players. Tommy walked around on the saloon set twirling his shiny guns. The lyrics we sang are what I believe to be the earliest version. I researched this song in 2009 in order to give credit for a book I was writing. I found nothing that came even remotely close to '55 or '56. This is what we performed: "Randolph the two gun cowboy / Had two very shiny guns / And if you ever saw them / You would turn around and run / All if the other cowboys / Used to laugh and call him names / They never let poor Randolph / Join in any poker games / Then one foggy Friday night / The sheriff came to say / Randolph with your guns so bright / Won't you guide my posse tonight / Then how the cowboys loved him / As they shouted off with glee / Randolph the two gun cowboy / You'll go down in history!" I doubt if the author of the original will ever be known, but this version was performed before an appreciative audience during a Christmas play in a rural mid-west community. Sergeant Major David Carden, US Army (Retired)
Dorothy - November 15, 2016 - Report this comment
I remember the song that Sargeant Major Carden refers to. I sang it in the early fifties. Have no idea where I first heard it.Enjoyed your version.

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