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Song Parodies -> "The (Millenium) Falcon"

Original Song Title:

"The Hunley"

Original Performer:

Derek Warfield

Parody Song Title:

"The (Millenium) Falcon"

Parody Written by:

E.S. Blofeld

The Lyrics

No ship can claim to have done so much to change the Galactic Civil War’s outcome as the Millenium Falcon. Thus, let us take a moment to honor its contributions
Here’s to you, the Falcon,
With Han and all your crew
You sailed on the Kessel Run
12 parsecs fast you flew
You sailed ‘round the galaxy
And even carried Luke
For to rescue Princess Leia
And to serve a cause so true

Gather round you bold-faced smugglers, you scum and villainy
And listen to a tale that began at Mos Eisley
Han Solo made a deal with ol’ Obi Wan and Luke
And with his life in danger, why, he never could rebuke

Here’s to you, the Falcon,
With Han and all your crew
You sailed on the Kessel Run
12 parsecs fast you flew
You sailed ‘round the galaxy
And even carried Luke
For to blow up that great Death Star
And to give Vader his due

You took off from that station with TIES in quick pursuit
And Chewie manned the cockpit as Han helped Luke to shoot
And when it seemed that Luke would fall to Vader’s hand
You strafed that TIE and saved Luke’s life to make that Star go blam!

Here’s to you, the Falcon,
With Han and all your crew
You sailed on the Kessel Run
12 parsecs fast you flew
You sailed ‘round the galaxy
With droids and Leia too
For to rendezvous at Bespin
And to flee from ‘perial doom

The Star Destroyer’s coming, so you hid within its trash
The Falcon was flying through big rocks without a crash
You tried to hide inside a cave, but mynocks ate the stern
And it turned out tha-at cave was exogorth space worm!

Here’s to you, the Falcon,
With Han and all your crew
You sailed on the Kessel Run
12 parsecs fast you flew
You sailed ‘round the galaxy
And saw the battle through
For to end the fight at Endor
And to give ol’ Palps his due

You took down Second Death Star, the Captain was Lando
But for some long reason, t’was your final show
The Falcon was a-stolen and likely given to
Some lonely trader living on Nemoidia or Jakku

Here’s to you, the Falcon,
With Han and all your crew
You sailed on the Kessel Run
12 parsecs fast you flew
You sailed ‘round the galaxy
And ended on Jakku
For to carry 2 new pilots
Who to Han would return you
I’m holding out hope that Solo will be a somewhat decent movie

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 4

Voting Breakdown

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User Comments

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Rob Arndt - March 28, 2018 - Report this comment
Nice one. But remember, a parsec is the measure of distance, Not speed! 12 parsecs is roughly 3.26 light years space. In the Han Solo movie, he does it by accident after being pursued by an ISD and T.I.E. fighters. Han used to race speeders before joining and then abandoning the Imperials after he sees how they use captured Woolies. 555!
Rob Arndt - March 28, 2018 - Report this comment
*Wookies! Damn Spellchecker!

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