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Song Parodies -> "The Round House Hurts"

Original Song Title:

"The Drugs Don't work"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

The Verve

Parody Song Title:

"The Round House Hurts"

Parody Written by:

Pixton Chuck

The Lyrics

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
All my blood is running cold
As Chuck comes down from above
With a kick to the face, he takes me down
There's a thud as I hit the ground

And I hear him breathing softly
As he lays a boot in my side
Now the round house hurts
Makes my insides burst
As he kicks me in the face again

Now the round house hurts
And Chuck's right on course
To haemorage my brain again

But I know I'm heading for defeat
'Cause he's kicked my ass down the whole street
And he's landed a blow, that knocked me out cold
And there's a stinging in my ear again

Now the round house hurts
And Chuck's beard is coarse
and it's growing on his face again

I'm crazy, ooh, what were my thoughts, I'm broken in two
He's cracked my head, he'll break my neck, and leave me for dead

My friend said I was getting bold
To get in a fight with Chuck
Like a human punch bag, on my face he'll pound
I'm getting really knocked around

Now the round house hurts
And it feels much worse
Than that time that I was maced my friend

It's scary, ooh, from all these falls, I'm under his shoe,
The times I've bled, cuts to my face, like streams running red

I was too slow, and like a scarecrow,
he's made sawdust out of my brain again

Now the round house hurts
And my skills don't work
And Chuck's kicking in my teeth again

Yeah he's kicking in my teeth again
Yeah he's kicking in my teeth again
Yeah he's kicking in my teeth again
Yeah he's kicking in my teeth again


I'm forever going down, I'm forever going down
to the floor, the floor, the floor,
I'm forever going down, I'm forever going down
to the floor, the floor, the floor,

Repeat to fade....
Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died. The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible. All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.

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