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Song Parodies -> "Bluegrass Christmas"

Original Song Title:

"Zoot Suit Riot"

Original Performer:

Cherry Poppin' Daddies

Parody Song Title:

"Bluegrass Christmas"

Parody Written by:

Old Man Ribber

The Lyrics

WTF? Another song about Christmas in Kentucky from Old Man Ribber? Absolutely! Once again, it's full of stereotypes, cliches, and jokes. Y'all listen up! ;D

Christmas here in the Fifteenth State!
There is nothin' that's half as great.
Happy hearts and a gap-toothed smile,
It's the season Commonwealth style.
Ev'ry hill and town is awash in Yuletide cheer.
Don't take our lights down.! Yeah we leave them up all year.
Bluegrass Christmas! Santa's landed on our tin roof.
Bluegrass Christmas! Our bourbon punch is a hundred proof!
Bluegrass Christmas! Although it's twenty below
Bluegrass Christmas! Let's write our names in the snow!
Go, Daddy!

From Paducah to Louisville
Folks are feeling the Arctic chill.
All are digging this winter scene
From Lexington to Bowling Green.
What a time is had! It's a blessing for the soul.
Hope y'all have been bad, 'cause we need to sell more coal.
Bluegrass Christmas! Snow on the outhouse tonight.
Bluegrass Christmas! Hope your butt doesn't get frostbite.

It's Yuletide in Kentucky!
And 'though the cold is sucky,
It beats Ohio, bucky!

Dadgummit too!
Watch out! Your cousin's -
Stalking you!
Sit a spell.
Sit down "rat cheer".
It's almost Christmas.
Have a beer!

Merry Christmas, friend! Don't you let the season pass.
Because if you do, we will open some "whoop *ss"!

Bluegrass Christmas! We gotta root for U.K.!
Bluegrass Christmas! Wouldn't have it any other way.
Bluegrass Christmas! Don't you dare mention Duke!
Bluegrass Christmas! If you do then I'm gonna puke!

It's Christmas, you hillbilly!
It's gonna be a dilly!
Although it's downright chily!

(Spoken) I think I'm about ready to celebrate now!

Imagine the shtick I could do if I was from Joisey, 'Frisco, or Texas! Better yet, if I lived in Britain, I might be making jokes about my Scots or Welsh heritage. ;D

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Matches Pace of
Original Song: 
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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.6
Overall Rating: 4.6

Total Votes: 11

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   1
 2   0
 3   0
 4   0
 5   10

User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

AFW - December 14, 2011 - Report this comment
That lousy one guy don't even have a Christmas spirit....great job here, OMR...filled with fun...favorite line.."Be bad we need to sell more coal"
John Barry - December 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Riotously funny.
Rob Arndt - December 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Here's 555 tidings of joy for you :)
Wendy Christopher - December 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Liked this one a lot! Is the 'One-sy' a Hillbilly, d'you think? Perhaps that's the highest he can count up to...! Anyway, it's a 555 from me.
Andria - December 14, 2011 - Report this comment
Great job... the band the OS is from comes from Eugene, OR, about 60 miles south of where I live, and I saw them live in concert at a bar in the city of Corvallis. There's a "Christmas In The Northwest" song out that gets extensive airtime here between Thanksgiving and Christmas, but it's sentimental instead of funny. 5s. BTW I'm pretty sure Mr. 1s is either a Jehovah's Witness who has a beef with non-JW's celebrating holidays or takes after Ebenezer Scrooge.
Old Man Ribber - December 15, 2011 - Report this comment
Thanks. Andria - the one bomber might be part of Occupy Amiright. But I believe he's part of "the artistry". They are amiright's Tri-Lateral Commission who ceaselessly strive to destroy anybody who is not a member of the club. They've already indicted me for wrecking the site by giving too many fives. If he keeps it up, I'll devulge his name, and my evidence is damning! Have a nice day! :D
Rebekah Dub - December 15, 2011 - Report this comment
I enjoyed this one, OMR. 5/5/5! Perhaps Mr. One-Scrooge would like a helping of Whoop Ass.

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