I was waiting in the express line with my nine items or less
At the checkout counter at my nearest grocery store
There's a paper that I've never seen before,how clever
And I learned some things I never knew before

It said,"Your pregnant girlfriend may be your dad's worst enemy."
It said,"Madonna's gonna be arrested for American Pie."
For the first time,Las Vegas will have an NBA franchise,that is
It is going to be called "Las Vegas Earthquakes",oh my!

Oh,Midnight Star!
It's in the weekly Midnight Star
The song,"Good Morning Beautiful",will be covered by the band Lonestar
Midnight Star,I wanna know,I wanna know

Hear the Spanish version of the Star-Spangled Banner
And don't miss the tv special,"Sesame Street Gone Wild!"
I couldn't stand a chance when the show,SpongeBob SquarePants
Was completely cancelled because of the "TV-Y gone PG" trial

Oh,Midnight Star!
Can't you believe it when you read it in the weekly Midnight Star?
"Power Rangers will be airing on TBS",it remarked.
Midnight Star,I wanna know,I wanna know

(Tell me,tell me,tell me how to make my bust line grow)
Midnight Star,I wanna know

Oh,Midnight Star!
Well,don't you know that I read it,I read it in the weekly Midnight Star
There will be a Dexter's Laboratory spinoff starring Mandark
Midnight Star,I wanna know,I wanna know
Midnight Star

Well, you can read all about it in the weekly Midnight Star
You can use your PSP to learn to play guitar
I wanna know,I wanna know
I wanna know,I wanna know
I wanna know,I wanna know
I wanna know,I wanna know
Inquiring minds like mine wanna know
I wanna know,I wanna know
I wanna know,I wanna know
I wanna know,I wanna know
I wanna know,I wanna know