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Song Parodies -> "Black Charcoal Cookin'"

Original Song Title:

"Black Magic Woman"

 (MP3)
Original Performer:

Santana

Parody Song Title:

"Black Charcoal Cookin'"

Parody Written by:

Robert D. Arndt Jr.

The Lyrics

Nothing is more terrible than "well done" meat! Translation? Burnt!!!
Hate that black charcoal cookin'
Nasty black charcoal cookin'

Meat cooked by your mom
And it's not even High heat
Claims it's well-done steak cookin'
Well, Hell No! I say, make mine bloody!

Makes my mom all red and angry
Quoting Bible Jew dietary

(The animal's soul is in the blood)

Hear my steak that is sizzling
Past turning brown, smoking it
All the blood draining, fizzling
Turning black, to pan stuck is it!

Looks like a hockey puck, crazy!
Tough as leather, not juicy!

Yeah, I'll make mom go crazy
Eat some raw before she's home
Ingesting blood I'm craving- forget cookin'
It's too bad this meat's cold!!!

Still better than charcoal...

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Voting Results

 
Pacing: 5.0
How Funny: 5.0
Overall Rating: 5.0

Total Votes: 10

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

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 3   0
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 4   0
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 5   10
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User Comments

Comments are subject to review, and can be removed by the administration of the site at any time and for any reason.

Max Power - November 26, 2015 - Report this comment
Personally I prefer well done meat but this parody is too. Keep up the attack on vegans. I don't have problems with vegetarians but vegans generally have a tendency to rub their beliefs into people's faces. With that said, they are asking for it when it comes to that.
Jonathan - November 26, 2015 - Report this comment
Bloody Brilliant! 5's ^ and yes Max vegans seem to be far more pretentious and preachy than just plain ol' vegetarians that being said I am clearly neither just had a buncha turkey tonight! Happy Thanksgiving to you both!
Rob Arndt - November 26, 2015 - Report this comment
This parody was about my dislike of well-done meat, usually executed as burnt. It defeats the purpose of the fat marbeling for juiciness and I have no problem with ingesting animal blood. The German Volk have a history of being excellent hunters. Rare steak should pool blood underneath and be crimson red inside. No marinating, no A1 sauce. Just some Kingsford and a bottle of Heinz 57 nearby. VM has nothing to do with this preference since childhood.

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