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Song Parodies -> "Cobblepot Vs. Galavan"

Original Song Title:


Original Performer:


Parody Song Title:

"Cobblepot Vs. Galavan"

Parody Written by:

Scotty Dangerously

The Lyrics

This is another musical tribute to Gotham, and it takes place in the episode “Mommy’s Little Monster” (Season 2 Episode 7). This song parody is a follow-up to Off to Save My Mom by Oswald Cobblepot. It starts where Oswald’s gang members and Oswald’s mother get killed at the Gotham docks. After those deaths, Oswald swears to get revenge by killing Theo Galvan for letting Tabitha (Theo’s sister) kill Oswald’s mother, Getrud Kapelput. Though, Oswald also dares Theo Galavan to shoot him, before Oswald attempts to kill Theo. By the way, I am the first person to write a parody of “Dodo/Lurker.”
***Oswald “Penguin” Cobblepot***:

My mom has died, Theo’s sister made my mother die
Butch betrayed me on my side, he men aside
Tabitha, Theo’s sister, stabbed my mother, that is how my mom died
Mommy fell dead, and it made me cry
It’s Theo’s fault, so Theo must die, must die, must die

***Theo Galavan*** (talking to Oswald):

Did you ever know what I meant
By consequences,
If you chose to come right here
With no common senses?

***Oswald “Penguin” Cobblepot*** (responding to Theo):

My mom is dead, it just hurts me
So why don’t you get out your own pistol
And just go ahead and try to shoot me

***Theo Galavan*** (responding to Oswald):

I just feel like cutting your throat
Cause you’re a sick man

**Oswald “Penguin” Cobblepot*** (responding to Theo):

But it’s your fault that my mom’s dead
So if you really think I’m a sick man
Then just go ahead and try to shoot me
Just try to shoot me

**Oswald “Penguin” Cobblepot*** (continues responding to Theo):

My mother, really loved me
And now she’s dead, you great ugly brute
You’re crazy, you think I’m a fool
You are evil from your head to your boot

You let...your sis
Chose to stab my mother in the back

You look so ugly, and you don’t look so good
And your evil mind looks like it’s on crack, on crack, on crack

***Theo Galavan*** (responding to Oswald):

Boy, I see you have the eyes
Of your own mother
But you do not have the heart
Of your own father

**Oswald “Penguin” Cobblepot*** (responding to Theo):

How do you know about my dad?
I never met him all of my life
So just go ahead and try to shoot me
Just try to shoot me
Just try to shoot me
Just try to shoot me

***Oswald “Penguin” Cobblepot*** (rapping):

So just as Galavan aimed his gun at me,
I instantly took out my own knife
To try to kill him, but could not
destroy his life

(Oswald runs out of the docks after failing to kill Galavan, and disappears into Gotham.)

***Oswald “Penguin” Cobblepot*** (singing):

I just ran to Gotham town
And I really swear
Galavan will soon die
Ooh but I feel alone
All because of my dead mother
In my eyes

I feel lost, and I feel down
Theo never cared
For my dearest mommy
Ooh but I do not know
About my own real father
Who is he?
This has been another tough, lesser-known Genesis song for me to parody. If you don’t know who Oswald’s dad is, he is Elijah Van Dahl, who is featured in the “Wrath of the Villains” episodes, “Mad Grey Dawn” & “Prisoners.” Elijah is played by Paul Reubens, the guy who did Pee-Wee Herman. I guess Paul Reubens chose to get serious to maintain his popularity. My upcoming Gotham parodies will include Elijah. Right now, I have a lot more Gotham song parodies to write to complete the Gotham musical. I plan to include a few or several Gotham parodies of solo songs by Phil Collins, besides his Genesis songs.

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Voting Results

Pacing: 4.6
How Funny: 4.9
Overall Rating: 4.7

Total Votes: 7

Voting Breakdown

The following represent how many people voted for each category.

    Pacing How Funny Overall Rating
 1   0
 2   1
 3   0
 4   0
 5   6

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