Blame it all on gray roots
They're all in cahoots
And ruined my black dye of hair
At first they still grew, but last night I knew
It was the last time I'd see some up there

Well it ain't no surprise
Least I'm through with the dyes
And I ain't gonna buy no damn rug
I trust that you know what I'm going through
I think I'll just get me some plugs

Chorus

Cause I got hair in low places
On my pubic mound where the cream chases
Those crabs away
Hope it grows O.K.

I'm not big in normal stages
At least it stretches out when the blood rages
And I've got hair
In low places

Well I guess I was wrong
But pubes don't grow long
So hey, I'll just take it slow
If I comb it right, in just the right light
It might look just like a small 'fro

I tried Afrosheen, but it just looked obscene
And smelled kinda sour so then
Shaved it as smooth as an ivory cueball
And poured me some gin

Cause I got hair in low places
On my pubic mound where the cream chases
Those crabs away
And I hope to stay

I'm not big in normal stages
At least it stretches out when the blood rages
Yeah I've got hair
In low places