(Drum roll)

Yeeeeaaaahhhh!
Van Halen's in the rock 'n' roll hall of fame
Eddie's not around, Eddie's not around, Eddie's not around, Eddie's not around
Al ain't there, Dave's gone too, who knew? Only Sam and Mike, both of who kicked out
But it's gon-na be a great shoooowww...
Oh, Yeaaaahhhhhh!

Van! Ha! - Len!
Slaaaaash, gonna play some old VH soooongs, with his group Velvet Revolveeerrrr, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah
They're gonna play "Ain't Talkin' 'Bout Love," oooh
Sam and Mike, doing their little speches, Eddie's in rehab now, Al's not here, Dave skipped out, Eddie's son Wolfang, and
Gary Cherone are not in attendance at all-all-all-all-all-all-allllllll, yeaaahhh

(Brief silence)

Oh yeah, Slash's guitar playing is so friggin' dead-on-on-on
Playin' Van Halen just like Eddie would, you know it-ya-ya-ya
Yeaaaahhh, but the tapping's nowhere to be fou-ou-ou-ound
Here-a-tap, here-a-tap, here-a-tap, here-a-tap, there-a-tap, there-a-tap, there-a-tap, there-a-tap
VR-plays, some-other-song, I-don't-know, then-old-Paul, Shaffer-and, Sam-and-Mike, play-"Why Can't, This-Be-Love"
Why-Paul-Shaf, fer-I-ask?, Letterman's, bandleader, balding-man, keyboard-man, talk-show-band, EVH, DLR, Sammy-H, AVH, everyone, with-good-taste, in-music, should-hear-some, Van-Halen, he-can-play, mean-guitar, mean-guitar, mean-guitar
Mean-guitar, he-can-play, he-can-play, mean-guitar, mean-guitar, EVH, EVH, EVH
Tapping-parts, tapping-parts, tapping-parts, tapping-parts galoooore!
Oh, yeaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh!